Why is Michael J. Fox so good at shake-a-weight? He is in shape.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

SHEA CAPOLUPO HAS A TINY SHLONG. 8- turn your head sideways haha.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q:What is the differenc between batman and a black man? A: Batman can go out in the night with out robin

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A man walks into a bar, and says ouch.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

roses are red , violets are blue , sugar is sweet and so are you. the roses are wilting the violets are dead. the sugar bowl is empty and so is your head

thumb_up thumb_down +3

If you replace all the letters in your name with G A Y it spells Gay... your gay

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Whats Black and White all Over? Ask Your Mother

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you call a black man who walks into a jail cell? A hard working and dedicated police officer who was just putting his first offender in jail.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Three aliens land in the middle of New York City. There is a huge media story about the first extraterrestrial life to be discovered on Earth.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Two muffins are being baked in an oven. One muffin turns to the other and says, "Man, it's starting to get really hot in here." The other muffin says, "MUFFINS CAN TALK?!"

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Your mother is SO wealthy, that she should help stop the poor children in Africa from starving by donating some spare change to the Let's-Help-Stop-The-Poor-Little-African-Children-From-Starving donation center. -not a real place!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A girlfriend scolds her boyfriend for "sitting on anti-joke all day." He then explains how it is impossible to sit on something that exists purely in digital form and instead noted it would be more correct to say sitting at a desk all day. She complied and saw the error of her ways.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the man fall off the cliff? I pushed him????????

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why can't the blonde dial 911? Because she's being held hostage against her will.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

I want to stick ma dick in a big bowl o puddin'

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How is pinocchio's nose like a penis? They're nothing alike.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A man walks into a man walks into a man walks into a man.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What bad thing could happen if you gave a black man a gun? ....stop expecting some racist punchline!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What happened to the black man when he was eating a Tootsie Roll? He ate the entire thing but was still hungry due to the empty calories.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A man is talking nonsense at a wall when another man walks up to him. "Why are you talking at a wall?" "I'm trying to appease the mighty wall god Kaleothayrhonka." "Cool, let me join you!" And they both talk at the wall for hours on end because they are stupid that way.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How do you keep a black man from robbing your house? Lock your doors, or perhaps get a update-to-date security system.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Knock knock who's there? Screw this Screw this who? Im screwing this like ur boyfriend screwed you!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why do Italian people like pasta? Because it tastes good.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops