How do you teach your daughter to stop wetting the bed? Cut her best friends eye-lids off at her birthday party.

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Yo momma so fat, people snicker as they walk past her, quietly laughing at a women obviously struggling with obesity. They then proceed to stop laughing, as they realize that their mother died from diabetes. They then proceed to move on with their day.

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What do u call a short Mexican Nothing that's normal

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How do you starve a black man? Take away his current food stocks, and means of income.

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Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, your wife and kids die.

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A lady with no legs walked..... never mind

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a man is bussy at work, when he gets called by his doctor. YOUR WIFE IS HAVING A BABY! the doctor yells. so the man runs to his car, drives home like a madman, and arrives home with his doctor holding the newborn in his arms. "congratulations" the doctor says "it's a boy" the man takes the baby in his arms and says: "but, this child is black!" his wife cheated on him and the familly breaks appart

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What's the difference between a black man and a white man, a white man has lighter skin

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What did the midget get for Christmas? A new watch and a gift card for Applebee's.

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A duck walk into a bar and asks the bartender for a drink. The bartender hands him a glass and the duck drinks it. After finishing his drink he ruminates about how drowning his misery with booze won't solve a thing in his life. He decided he'll call his ex-wife and apologize and goes back home.

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Three men walk into a bar, they are promptly served and then they go home. Later that evening the bartender closes the bar and goes upstairs to his apartment where he is struggling with his debt... Business hasn't been as good these days.

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Roses are red Violets are? blue I'm going to rape you in the ass with a rake.

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A seal walks into a club.

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How do you kill a blond? Well there are many ways the most effiont way is to shoot them

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If you're happy and you know it - put your hands in the air i have a gun.

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Whats worse than a gay pride parade? Genocide.

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A Muslim walks into a bomb shop. Unfortunately for the bomb shop owner, the Muslim was a police officer. He proceeded to arrest the owner and the employees of the store, as it turned out that the selling of these particular explosive devices were illegal. They ended up in jail, and justice was served.

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So I was eating pancakes in my driveway...or were they waffles?

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what did the guy tell the other guy? you're gay

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Why did the Skyrim guard stop adventuring? He got cancer.

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Billy Corgan: The world is a vampire! Me: No it's not. The world is a mass of mineral compounds that floats in space approximately 93,020,000 miles from the sun. It is not, in fact, a vampire.

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Why did the baby cry? Because his parents dropped him on his head.

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What is worse than falling down the stairs? Having leukemia.

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It was nice knowing you Erron, it really was.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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