What did the little boy order at Burger King? He ordered a burger and wiped his booger on the counter.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did the chicken cross the road. ... So he could be hit by a car.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

please ignore the bottom two 'jokes' as they were written by josh carey and ryan danielz

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did the chicken cross the road? -Why? I don't know,I'm asking you the question.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

If an illegal immigrant fought a child molester, is it Alien vs. Predator?

thumb_up thumb_down -22

How does a cow does a cow do an evil laugh? Mooooooohahahahaha

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A duck walked up to the lemonade stand And he said to the man running the stand: QUACK!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A man walks into a bar with tears rolling down his cheeks. The bartender asks why are you so blue? The man says he has blue skin disorder and that everyone has been making fun of him...

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What happened when the Mexican man contracted the muscles of his large bowel after a large meal? Shit made its way to his anus

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Hi

thumb_up thumb_down -24

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What do you call a shattered lightbulb? A hazard that should be taken very seriously.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Wanna here a funny joke Oh right. You can't hear

thumb_up thumb_down -24

You know what sucks? Yes.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why didn't Sally make it to school on time? She got savagely beaten and raped.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What's worse than eating brussel sprouts? Getting raped by a brussel sprout.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Knock Knock Who's there? Well why don't you open the door and find out!

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why can't Ray Charles read? Because he's dead

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A deaf, mute clown wearing nothing but a dead cat, a rainbow wig, and his own feces breaks into a couples home on April fools day. Then he murders them both because he is an escaped patient from an asylum for the criminally insane.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the dog that was chasing it.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumbty took a great fall Because he was terribly intoxicated And failed to properly balance himself.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

what did the white man say to the black man with the gun? Nothing he was dead

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What do Gay horses eat? Cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

why did the chicken cross the road? I Lied, it was a cow not a chicken and it was a highway full of speeding cars slamming into the cow body until it would stop moooooooooooooooooving...

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops