*spongebob voice* 25

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Q: How does 5 gay people walk together? A: In One Direction.

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What do you call: A black person, A white person, A mexican, A Jew, And an athiest? Whatever their names are!

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What is brown and sticky? A stick

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How do you kill a blonde? you shoot her.

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What do you call a snake with no arms? Normal. What do you call an amphibian with no arms? A caecilian. What do you call a girl with no arms? A poor, poor soul that is unfortunate enough to have had an amputation when young. Now, she can't go in public without being stared at. She can't catch herself when she trips. She can't ride a bike, bake cookies for her family, or be a NASA astronaut like she always dreamed. She is the normal ASDF Movie character.

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A grasshopper goes into a bar It is stepped on and crushed.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Baby you think i loved you, but you got played too

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What's green and gets people high? A green helicopter

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A Blonde, a Brunette, and a Red head walk into a bar They are friends from school and have not seen each other in 15 years; they are hoping to have a good night out

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Q: What did the chinese man say to the other Chinese man? A: I don't know, I don't sneak Chinese

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Your mom is so fat, that it causes great concern for her family.

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did you hear about the man who crossed the road? he made it.

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Why did Susy fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Susy.

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What do u call two mexicans playing basketball? Juan on Juan!

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Somewhere over the rainbow.... Is land.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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A grandmother in her late seventies is walking to the grocery store. Then out of nowhere,she stats getting pelted by bananas. One hits her hard on the head,and she dies.

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Me: Hey, Johnny! Do you see that Tree? Johnny: No. Me: Neither do I.

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Why grannies do not buy a menstrual pads? Cause they will never have their period anymore.

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Yo mamma is so fat she needs a highly dangerous gastrointestinal bypass and if she dies you will wish she had made more of an effort to diet.

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Whats the XBOX JUAN's most popular game. Call of Juarez!!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? No one is quite sure because technology is not advanced enough for humans to converse with chickens.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Not having enough money to buy an apple.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops