Aodhan peanut head Hearty

Why did the deer die Because Jupiter is incapable of supporting life

A baby seal walks into a club.

A Man: Why does it seem as though you always find what you need in the last place you look? Another Man: Probably because you don't continue to look.

A black man in a country bar.

Yo momma is so fat I really feel sorry for her.

The original joke: "WATCH OUT FOR THAT HOLE!" "WHAT HOLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" The anti joke, aka realistic edition: "WATCH OUT FOR THAT HOLE!" "WHAT YAAAAAAAAAAAARGHHHHHHHHH!" The ballon edition: Original: "Balloon! Watch out for that Cactus!" "What Cactussssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss..." (leaking air you slowmo) The anti-joke aka realistic version: "Balloon watch out for that pointy soda!" "What soda *pop*" Moral: None of these where the least realistic!

why is 6 afraid of 7 ? because 7 is black.

Two women are sitting quietly in a corner, minding their own business.

A mother and her kid are in a park: Kid: Why did the chicken go to jail? Mother: Because the chicken killed your father... Now we are broke living in a park and I'm gonna kill myself at noon, and so are you. Kid: I'm not doing that, and neither are you and Daddies over their! The dad is a zombie, this is the beginning of the zombie apocalypses. THE END!!! PUPPIES!!!!!!!!!

Women have the right to vote.

There once was a man in Peru Who dreamed he was eating his shoe He awoke with a fright In the middle of the night To find that someone was breaking into his house

what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding several worms in your apple.

What do you call an African baby?............................................ A Nigglet.

Does this napkin chloroform?

Q:What did the hillbilly say when he lost his tractor? A: Where is my tractor

Why did the black man not tip his waiter? Because she provided terrible service and was undeserving.

What do you call a tree with no branches? A stick.

Barack Obama

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

why the woman scream when she arrived at her surprise party? Everyone was dead!

Knock Knock. Who's there? God. God Who? ::Apocalypse follows::

what did the homeless guy get for christmas nothing!

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? None.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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