Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

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How did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a gun, Get in the car.

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black guy graduating high school

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Women Driving.

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A Palestinian and an Israeli both board a plane at the same time. They exchange awkward glances and take seats at different ends of the plane.

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You wanna hear a joke about my penis Nevermind, it would be inappropriate of me to say such a thing.

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This one time at band camp... I played an instrument and learned to march with the rest of my school's band.

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*knock knock* Who's there? *Gorilla* Gorilla who? *Gorillas don't hoot, owls hoot*

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Why i'm breathing? I don't want die.

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so dont touch it.

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whats the best thing about polio...death

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Charlie Sheen walks into a bar... Every morning, and stays until it closes... [credit gilbert gottfried]

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A man who was clearly tired and worn out enters a bar. The bartender says "Long night, eh?" The man responds "Yes, very. I was with my girlfriend." The bartender says in response "Well I'm sure that was a fun time, if you know what I'm sayin." "No, not really" says the man. Little did the bartender know, the man's girlfriend was a dominatrix.

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.....Carrot Top....

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Whats Something everyone has except david? Money.

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Why was the fat man removed from the restaurant? When his date didn't show up he started and crying and proceeded to stab himself with a fork

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ask me if im a house are you a house? no

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what do you do if you get in a car wreck with a black man get out of your vehicle and exchange insurance information

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You have 6 basketballs. One rolls away. How many do you have? None because your family has a low income, lives in a broken down trailer, and has 5 other kids to supply for.

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How long will it take for a dog to paint a color wheel? I don't know.

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Q: What's up? A: Definitely not a plane, due to an unfortunate hijacking and terror bombing shortly after departure. There were no survivors.

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What's worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? Three bee stings

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When life gives you lemons, You find a new life

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops