I have Alzheimer. What?

Why are you reading this? You should be taking a shower, you smell like crap.

What is less sanitary than eating food off of the ground? Anal sex.

a drumset fell off a clif. Badoom ch.

Why did the plane crash and everybody die on board? The plane crashed because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Your mother is so fat........... that she is morbidly obese and is at severe risk for diabetes and other weight related diseases.

Your mother is so old that she is dead.

3 Mormon men walk by a blonde woman eating a banana. They are not distracted by this and continue their journey of spreading Christianity.

What do you get when you put a cat in a Xerox machine? A copycat.

What did one chimney say to the other chimney. Nothing, chimneys dont talk.

What's green and has wheels? Boogers on a skateboard.

19th amendment

What would Guy and Hemech's reactions be if they saw this joke up? They would see it from the newest jokes

Knock Knock Who's there? A Kid With ADD A Kid With AD- Oh Look! A Squirrel!

Knock knock. Who's there? Your neighbour. My neighbour who? Timothy, welcome to the neighbourhood!

Why is the apple mushy? Because a car ran over it.

What do you get when a bulldog and shitzu reproduce? A litter of extremely cute puppies.

how do you kill a blonde? hit her in the back repeatedly with a crowbar

Why couldn't Sally ride a bicycle? She doesn't have a bicycle. She also doesn't have legs.

What's red and smells like green paint? The rotting corpse of the old lady I poisoned with green paint.

A

Why did the deer die Because Jupiter is incapable of supporting life

Whats the difference between ice cream and dead babies? I'm not eating ice cream right now.

What do you call a mexican riding a lawnmower? Promoted

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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