How did the comedian end his show with a bang? He shot 4 people in the audience. It was a horrible sight and the remainder of the people in the audience were scarred for life.

What did the Dog say to the Cat? Nothing, Cats and Dogs are of different species and can therefore not understand one another.

A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

what happened to the boy that walked down the street he got hit by a falling street light

Ask me if I am a tree. Are you a tree? No.

A duck walks into a bar.... Animal control is swiftly called and the duck is relocated to a nearby park.

Why is an orange, orange. Because you can't clean a window with a spade.

What do you get when you read a book? More knowledge in your brain.

What do you get after putting bread in a toaster? -Toast.

Why did the rabbit cross the road? I don't know, I was asking you.

Q: what is long hard and full of seamen A: a submarine

What is grey and smells like sand? A Rock.

a potato flew around my room

what do you call a black pilot? A) a pilot

two guys walk into a bar. the third guy ducks

A hipster gets summoned for jury duty. The case is solved promptly and everyone goes home happy.

Once upon a time, a story teller used the "once upon a time" metaphor in order to tell you your parents have died in a terrible accident

How do you know it's a Mexican's birthday? They bring cupcakes to school for your entire class to enjoy.

your mamas so fat all she gets for christmas and her birthday is girdles!

What's Pink And Fluffy? Pink Fluff.

A kid walks into a bar. The bartender promptly calls child protective services and the child is placed in a caring foster home.

Q: I have 2 dogs. Why? A: I like dogs

There are four worms walking in a straight line. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The fourth worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied!

why couldn't the chicken cross the road? it was hit and killed by a vehicle, much like all animals that try and cross roads. created by KA

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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