what is fat, sweaty, and italian? Italians

thumb_up thumb_down +56

Two cowboys are in a kitchen. The first one says, "I feel at Home on the range!" To which the second replies, "Is that because of your extensive culinary background?" The first cowboy breaks down in tears because he has never pursued his real dream.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

Two Gay Men Walk Into a Bar, Not Just Any Bar...... a Sports Bar and Enjoy a nice cold Beer with their Heterosexual friends while watching the super bowl. They both go in the back room, where it is dark, together........ and they call for the manager to find out where the chef is so they can tie him down..... and smother him....... in questions concerning the size of his....... buffalo wings stop judging people you ass.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

I baked you a pie! Oh boy! What flavor? Apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

Why was the little boy so bad at the piano? It was his first time playing it.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

Girls go to college to get more knowledge. Boys go to Jupiter because they are highly trained astronauts taking part in a multi-year space journey to explore part of the solar system that man has never dreamed to be feasible.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

What did the cheerleader get on Holloween? Raped.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple. What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A Holocaust survivor.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

Are you from Tennessee? Because I can tell by your accent.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

What is an Anti-Joke? This is.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

this sentence will not monkey banana pie

thumb_up thumb_down +46

A priest, rabbi, and mormon are arguing about which religion is best. A zookeeper hears and says, "I have a bear who is sleeping right now. How about whoever converts the bear belongs to the best religion?" The priest goes in first, and then walks out a few minutes later, unharmed. The mormon does the same, and he too exits unscathed. The rabbi goes in, and walks out covered in claw marks. "How'd it go?" Said the zookeeper. "Easy." Said the priest. "I just sprinkled some Holy water on him." "I did the same." Said the mormon. The rabbi looked at the zookeeper and said, "have you ever tried to circumcise a bear?"

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Why couldn't little Sally talk? Someone stapled her tongue to wall.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

What's the difference between a freezer and a baby? A freezer doesn't scream when I pack my meat into it.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

How do you punish an electrician? Kill his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.????????

thumb_up thumb_down +42

3 guys walk into a bar....dont you think one would see it ?

thumb_up thumb_down +42

If shoes could talk they'd tell you that they are not willing support your weight & floors are extremely dirty.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

What do you call a gay black man driving off a cliff? A fine example of the dangers of drink driving.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Why wasn't there a rainbow? It didn't rain.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

What's there like a good neighbor? Your neighbor

thumb_up thumb_down +40

A black man and a mexican jump from a tree. Who hits the ground first? The mexican. The black man had a rope tied around his neck.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Why did the bus fall down? It was hit by a bus and then repeatedly battered by a blender

thumb_up thumb_down +40

You wanna know the funniest joke ever? Justin bieber

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops