Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a truck? You have HIV.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

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What is black, white and red all over? A black, white and red pen.

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A bartender walks into a bar. It's his shift.

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Knock Knock Who's there? A bag of burning crap.

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Whats worse then getting hit by a truck? Getting hit by a turkey!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was Friday night (or Halloween or St. Patty's Day) and the chicken was at a party. He got totally drunk, and then got the bright idea that it would be okay to drive home. On a rural two-lane highway, his vehicle careened into the oncoming traffic lane, and then the ditch, thus crossing the road. Fortunately, he walked away with only a few scratches. However, he was cited for wreckless driving, and got a DUI as well.

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Q: What time do you see a Chinese dentist? A: Never because China has a flawed healthcare system due to overpopulation. It is a sad and sobering reality of the plight of the Chinese citizens.

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Whas the difference between a boy going to a camp and a jewish boy going to camp? The jewish boys does not come back.

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Why did Jimmy fall off his bike? He had no arms… Why did he have no arms? Jimmy was a potato

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I like toast -my name is Bob and I approve of this message

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There are four dead people on a boat. They commit suicide. Why did they commit suicide. To get to the other side!

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Why was the little boy crying? Because a stranger shoved explosives up his butthole.

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What's worse than being the last man on earth with thousands of women to please? Realizing that you are gay and there are no men left.

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What did the priest say to the nun? ... I don't know, I wasn't there.

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two penguins are sitting in a bath tub. one penguin says, "hey, can you hand me the soap?" the other penguin says, "what do i look like, a typewriter?"

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what do a fish and wood have in common? when they're dead, they float

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Daniel Textor can suck a gooch he's such a F - A - GGGGG!! Let's beat him up at lunch.

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What did the vegitarian order for dinner? Vegatables

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Q: Why did the bird fall out of the tree? A: It was dead Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was stapled to the bird

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Penis

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Your moms so poor that when she went to buy a bag of chips, she couldn't buy the bag of chips, because she didn't have enough money to buy the bag of chips

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Why do undertakers wear ties? Because their profession is very serious, and it is important that their appearance has a degree of gravitas

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What do you call Americas first black president? A change.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops