What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A treadmill... did I mention he was kinda fat?

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Why did the blonde become a cannibal? Because she got hungry.

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how do you starve a man who is on welfare? hide his food stamps under his work boots.

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Three bars walk into a Jew.

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Why do flamingos hold up one leg?f If they held up two they'd fall down.

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how many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb just 2 but it beats me how they got in there

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What did the one bagpiper say to the other? Nothing, one cannot speak while playing the bagpipes.

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What did the Batman say to the Joker? "I am the Batman."

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Q: What do you get when you cross a rare breed of penguin with a horse. A: Well to be fair, turtles have shells

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roses are blood violets are veins vampires are crazy and you are insane

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What is worse then North Korea trying to blow up everybody? Peter Griffin twerking.

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Miranda Cosgrove's singing career. ......Thats it. Thats the joke.

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What did the dog say to the mouse? Cat

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Q: Ask me how far have you gone with a girl? A: Mexico

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Why is god mean? Cause he doesn't like you.

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Why did the Jew die? Because Hitler was born...

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Curiosity killed the cat and was sentenced to prison for animal abuse.

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Why did the cancer patient shave his head? He wanted to pretend he still had hair.

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Sonic

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Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything is black, And I'm blind.

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so a horse walks into a bar right, and he goes up to the bartender, and the bartender being a smartass says why the long face(get because hes a horse), and the horse says his wife is dying of lung cancer, child services are taking his kids away , and im addicted to crack and that is why i have a long face the bartender then gives him the next round for free and the the horse dies of alchohol poisoning

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What's better than eating baby? Nothing.

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you'r mom is so fat that whenever she goes to the doctors, they are concerned about her cholesterol levels and high blood pressure.

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You know what your problem is? I'm too good looking.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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