What is the difference between Charlie Sheen and Michael Jackson? One is dead, one is not.

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What happened to the black man when he was eating a Tootsie Roll? He ate the entire thing but was still hungry due to the empty calories.

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Why'd the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was tied to the first one.

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What did the Black guy, the Asian, and the White guy have in common? they were all brutally murdered.

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Bill: My vagina is itchy. Tom: You don't have a vagina. It was later found out that bill had a sex change and did have an itchy vagina, due to an STI. He later died of cancer.

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Why can't Bob go to the store? He's dead.

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Why did the vegetarian lose her foot? Diabetes.

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

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Yo mama's so fat that she took a look at her life and realized she wanted a change so she joined a dieting group and started eating better and exercising more and she got down to her goal weight and now looks and feels better than ever it's very inspirational, good for her.

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So there are two skunks in a bath tub. One of the skunks says to the other, "Would you please pass the soap?", and the other skunk says, "What do you think I am, a talking radio?!"

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so a horse walks into a bar right, and he goes up to the bartender, and the bartender being a smartass says why the long face(get because hes a horse), and the horse says his wife is dying of lung cancer, child services are taking his kids away , and im addicted to crack and that is why i have a long face the bartender then gives him the next round for free and the the horse dies of alchohol poisoning

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Why are females bad drivers? Because it is hard to drive with pots and pans.

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Whats bloody and wrinkly? Your nans fanny

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Samantha

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If u see a guy with a buzz cut and earrings what would u ask? R u a girl with cancer

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Is this where I type the joke?

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Yes.

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Q. what does a metal slinkey and a retarded person have in common? A. you will smile watching one fall down the steps

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What do you call a guy who died in a stampede? Grandpa.

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Why did the chiken cross the road? Well its wing were clipped so it couldnt fly across the road.

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what did the asain have for dinner? A: rice

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What happened to the starving african kid? He died

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How do you avoid dying? You can't everything dies.

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The 13th Amendment...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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