Patient: Hey doc, I think I might have a tumor... Doc: Don't worry, it's all in your head.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Say eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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if a dinosaurs could talk, what would they say nothing their all dead

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whats a dexter whats a died? HaHaHaHaHa Im so so funny

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My brother found snow in his hair from last year... only people who know me know this joke!!haha -sopie

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Why was the little boy sad? Cause his mum died of a terminal illness. Why was the little girl sad? Cause she was his sibling.

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How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? Watermelons don't have feet.

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what is worse then breaking on arm breaking two arms what is worse then breaking two arms the holocaust what is then the holocaust Obama care.

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Why did the man have 3 girlfriends? A: because he is a womanizer

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whats red that looks like ketchup taste like ketchup and is't tomato sorce? ketchup

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Why did the chicken cross the road? A chicken doesn't need a motive to cross a road, it just does.

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you ever put a vibrating phone on your b a l l s ???

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Q: John has 400 cookies, 200 hundred are chocolate chip and the rest are sugar. John eats 100 of each, what does he have now? A: Diabetes

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Why women like NBA players so much? Because they have money.

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Why didn't the hungry woman get up and make herself some food? She has Lou Gehrig disease and any movement she makes results in excruciating pain.

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9/11

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How do you fit four gay on a bar stool? Divide the given space into fourths and convince them to share it accordingly. However, due to the fact that bar stools are significantly smaller than the average chair, and the likelihood that the bar has the resources to provide chairs for all of their customers, it would be highly unlikely that the men would choose be remain seated in such an inconvenient manner.

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How was the fifty-four year old counselor in nineteen places at once? He was blasted by a cannonball.

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Suzie has no arms and no legs and is on a swing. what happened? she fell and died knock knock whos there? not suzie.

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what did the muffin say to the other muffin when they were in the oven? hi, im a muffin

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Two gay guys walk into a Hooters... They order cheese fries and enjoy their meal.

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Yes and no, I am into literature, I am a writer, of how to rape and kill guides for the whole family (raping the whole family that is, again instructions for the whole family with inspirational quotes) Now give an example of each book to each family member without a cover stating what the book is... ...And after the first time, the world was never the same again.

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British Dentistry

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Ya know how when geese fly in a V-shape, one side is longer than the other? -Yes Do you know why that is? -No Because there's more geese on that side

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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