What do giant panda bears eat? giant bamboo

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Breast cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn people on the other side that the sky was falling Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Shit!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at rhyming Refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Hitler arrives at his neighbor's barmitzfah... fashionably late.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

why couldn't the boy eat his oreo's? His sister ate it.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: What happened to the 16 year old pregnant black woman? A: She gave birth to a baby in 9 months.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

how do you confuse a blond?

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How did the carpenter do on his exam? Poorly so his parents killed him.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: How do you kill an Asian? A: Deprive of calculator or shoot it.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

how do you make a family tan? You burn them in the house.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do you call a kid with cancer? screwed

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do you call a black man climbing a mountain. A mountain climber.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Men's Sports

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do you call a homosexual in the army? A brave and honorable person who should be applauded for their service to this great nation

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Doctor, doctor, I just swallowed a roll of film! That was an incredibly foolish and dangerous thing for you to do. I would be surprised if you survived another day before the chemicals corrode your stomach lining and release hydrofluoric acid throughout your body causing sepsis.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's green , has 4 legs and if it fell out of tree on you , would hurt you ? A Pool table

thumb_up thumb_down +4

roses are red , violets are blue , sugar is sweet and so are you. the roses are wilting the violets are dead. the sugar bowl is empty and so is your head

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Henry: Say the word "really". Moe: Really. Henry: Now say the word "really" with sarcasm. Moe: Really? Henry: More sarcasm! I want you to be very sarcastic! Moe: Oh really??? Henry: There ya go!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A man runs into a house and unloads a round of bullets killing 2 people in the kitchen. He wins Search and Destroy for his team at Nuketown.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why are you reading anti-jokes? ... why are you looking at me like that? I asked you a question, idiot.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do you call two dead blondes? A terrible day for their families and for many more to come

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops