Why did Jerry Sandusky go to the shower room? He hadn't showered all week and was beginning to smell.

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What is better than a cat? Nothing

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What's big, green, fuzzy, and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table

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Roses are grey Violets are grey Because I'm colorblind

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Why did the coconut fall out of the tree? Gravity.

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Q. How do you break into a store that's closed? A. You walk in, I was lying about it being closed.

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How long did it take for Michael to screw in the lightbulb? 37 minutes. Michael has cerebral palsy.

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Heat oven to 375°. Grease 18 regular-size muffin cups (or 12 large size muffins). In bowl, mix butter until creamy. ... Add eggs one at a time, beating after each. Beat in vanilla, baking powder and salt. With spoon, fold in half of flour then half of milk into batter; repeat. Fold in blueberries.

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Why did the little girl fail her test? Because she had mental retardation.

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Why was Bootylatrice tardy for school? -She overslept.

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Why did the Mexican push his wife off a cliff? Because after twenty long years of monotonous nagging, he finally snapped.

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What do you call a white guy surrounded by 10 black guys? In this situation, the minority.

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Let's see how many dislikes this can get!

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Whats small, rough, and painful to put in your ass? Sandpaper

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How do you spell Mississippi with out an i? You can't because removing an i from the word Mississippi would cause it to be spelled incorrectly.

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Why wasn't there a rainbow? It didn't rain.

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What did the Dog say to the Cat? Nothing, Cats and Dogs are of different species and can therefore not understand one another.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was an identity thief.

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Roses are red, violets are blue. Grass is green.

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TEAM Together Everyone Argues More

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Cows go moo.

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What did the father say to his gay son? "Finish your homework."

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Jimmy went to a bar, to see a stand up comedian, he heard the standup comedian tell a funny joke, so after the show, he went home and told his wife the joke and after that he said, i made that up, im funny arent i, the wife seemed shifty, so she googled the joke and found the stand up comedians joke, giggled and then proceeded to continue back angrily to Jimmy, because he just did the wrong thing, she slapped Jimmy in the face, divorced Jimmy and killed his 3 children because Jimmy plagurised, and plagurism is illegal, and now Jimmy has no children, and a red mark on his cheek and knows he did the wrong thing don't smoke kids

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where are you?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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