all these jokes suck ass

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What do you call girls that can run faster than me? Virgins

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. It was a dead monkey.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? "THE chicken" indicates a definite article, you really would have to specify which chicken you're talking about so i can identify whether i was there at the given moment that the chicken tried to cross the road and to ask it his reason for attempting it.

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Q: what animal didnt get on Noah's ark in pairs? A: worms. they got on in apples.

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As little Timmy crossed the finish line his heart raced with excitement he had just won the big race. Later he and his family went home to celebrate they had pizza and chips and soft drinks. Then they played scrabble and watched spiderman 2. After that Timmy went to sleep. When his parents found him that morning they mourned and mourned because their hero little Timmy was still asleep.

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Why did the chicken cross the road Because you didn't fuking cook to -.-

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My name is Harry.

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25

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two blondes walk into a bar... to get to the other side

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Whats worse than finding out that your family is dead? finding a worm in your apple

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Penisland

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How do you keep a secret? Kill yourself.

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Yo Momma is so fat that she is heavier than most other women her age

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Why was the 45 year old man crying? He shit his pants.

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What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they've may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

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Q: How many years does it take for a deer to grow into a moose? A: 7

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What is scary? Obama might get reelected.

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What did the man bring home from Africa? AIDS.

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Hi is the longest two letter word in the world

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Someone asked me yesterday why my friend Portier is named after a sports car... I mean, fair enough, it is a common misconception but they live in the country and her Dad drives a tractor; think it through. [L]

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a man walks into a bar, and gets mauled by a bear..... and gets a concussion

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Back when I was your age, we had to entertain ourselves with video games and TV.

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whats white, blue, and red all over? a white guy in the ghetto

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops