Why is an orange, orange. Because you can't clean a window with a spade.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

An asian without a future.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Yo mama's so fat that she takes too muc oh fuck it I'm stuffed Henri and Chaz

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Police say's 'have you been drinking' and you reply back saying 'YES' then the police brings out the blower and you blow, it says on it that you are fine, but then the cops ask you 'what did you drink' and you just say 'well i drank juice for breakfast then had some water, tea, coffee' the cops get really angry but before he says anything you say that ' I AM MUSLIM'

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Q: how many oxen does it take to row up the empire state building in half of a green canoe under the purple sun while eating a dead moose with no arms? A: Purple, because snakes have no elbows.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Horton Hears... Rape and violence and doesn't do anything about it.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What is large, white, and can't climb trees? A refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A bike with no handle bars or pedals.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

A kid walks into a bar. The bartender promptly calls child protective services and the child is placed in a caring foster home.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Dick spice

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Welcome To Facebook

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why did the chicken cross the road? I dream of a day when chickens won't be questioned about their actions

thumb_up thumb_down +24

a drumset fell off a clif. Badoom ch.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why are you reading this? You should be taking a shower, you smell like crap.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Yo sugars so salty when you put it on your french fries they taste like salty french fries

thumb_up thumb_down +24

why did the kid get chemotherapy? because he had cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +24

How many testicles did Adolph Hitler have? Two.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What's the difference between jelly and jam? Jelly is made from the juice of the fruit while jam is made from the pulp of the fruit.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why did the bartender kick out the three jews at midnight? Because the bar closes at 11.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Nock Nock. Whose there? The chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

The daring man said "here goes nothing." And nothing happened. -Tag

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What's green and has wheels? Boogers on a skateboard.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Eating the worm

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops