Roses are red, Violets are blue, Barrack Obama shops at Baby Gap

Paul and Steve, Siamese twins attached at the head, come to a fork in the road they are traveling. Paul wants to go left, while Steve wants to go right. They pause for a moment to figure out which direction would be the best choice for the both of them. They decide to go Paul's way, and as they continue to travel in silence, they try to imagine what life as a self-reliant individual would be like.

A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released into a nearby park.

what did the man with no arms and no legs get for christmas? a new hat

Q. What do you call a small hen that can't lay eggs properly? A. A small hen that can't lay eggs properly.

What has 3 legs? An abnormal human.

Why did the man stand on one foot? Because he had one leg.

Why did your mom cross the road? She Tripped and started rolling

Shotest joke ever... Your dick.

Where do black jews go? The back of the oven

How many dead jews can you fit in a hole? Ask hitler.

A man sees a clown, a robot, and a monkey walking down the street side by side. The man ponders the randomness of life.

So a seal walks into a club..

Whats the difference between babies and basketballs? You cant unload a truck of basketballs with a pitchfork.

how many aliens does it take to change a light bulb? i wouldn't know, i have never seen one and there is the off chance that they don't even exist

A:why did sam fall of the wing ? B:why ? A:she had no arms. B:... A:knock knock. B: who is there ? A:not sam

Give a man a fire and he will be warm for the rest of the night. Set a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life.

Chuck Norris walks into a bar. Everybody leaves except Michael Jackson. Michael Jackson never walked out alive

your mom is so old. she can legally get a senior discount

How do you get a clown to stop smiling? Throw a brick at him.

I have Alzheimer. What?

what do you watch ? a tv

A man walks into a bar. While he sits on a barstool, a man greets him politely, and they proceed with light conversation.

I like toast -my name is Bob and I approve of this message

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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