why'd the baby cross the road it was stapled to the chicken

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how many large people can you fit in a bath tub ... 1/16

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A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want to hear first?" The man responds "I'd like to hear the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance covered everything." The man hangs his head and tears up as he asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor heads for the door as he answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you're being denied coverage. None of your future treatments or appointments will be paid for." The man snaps his fingers and says "I should've voted Democrat!"

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What do you call 500,000 white guys jumping out of a plane? There's no such thing. 500,000 people can't fit onto one plane.

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Why did the Jew have very bad gas? He had very rough anal sex and air got stuck up his bum

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Why are black guys good at basketball? Hard work and determination.

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A midget walks under a bar

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What's spongy and smells of treacle? Treacle sponge

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What's brown and sticky? Poo.

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Knock knock. Is someone there?

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Why cant penguins fly? because they cant

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trumpy trumpy trump

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Why did Sally Drop here ice cream? She was hit by a bus. Knock Knock? *who's there* Not Sally.

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Paul and Steve, Siamese twins attached at the head, come to a fork in the road they are traveling. Paul wants to go left, while Steve wants to go right. They pause for a moment to figure out which direction would be the best choice for the both of them. They decide to go Paul's way, and as they continue to travel in silence, they try to imagine what life as a self-reliant individual would be like.

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What happened when the man rubbed the magical lamp? Nothing.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is black

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what do you call a fish with no eyes fsh

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What's the difference between basketball and an elephant? One's a sport and one's a large African animal.

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what did the turkey say on thanks giving? Nothing, he's dead, we ate him!

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What is large white and if it fell out of a tree would kill you? A refridgerator

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When we was Antarctica and it was cold we would huddles arounds a candles. What did we do when it was colder? We lit the candle,

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Why did the leprechaun cross the road? If you still believe in leprechauns, you need to see a doctor.

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Chinese, Japanese, dirty knees - have nothing at all in common.

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There are three types of people in this world: The stupid. And the ones that can't count.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops