If you are riding a horse, how many watermelons does it take to kill a giraffe? Platypus.

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Do you know what a lion really is? It's an over sized cat.

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What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A Pilot

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how do you warm someone up? you set their house on fire.

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Your mom walks into a bar.

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A blonde, brunette and redhead are stuck on an island that is a mile away from any civilisation.The blonde decides to swim to find help. The blonde swims half a mile, has a rest and then carries on swimming.

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if a dinosaurs could talk, what would they say nothing their all dead

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Why didn't the hungry woman get up and make herself some food? She has Lou Gehrig disease and any movement she makes results in excruciating pain.

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A bear walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender knows that bears can't talk and realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and rolls over to tell his wife about the dream. She hears the joke, but turns away from him and pretends to be asleep. Then the bartender begins to cry. His marriage is in shambles.

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what do you call a disabled black man getting beat up? an unfortunate human

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her.

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Why did Billy start crying? Becuase he's fat and stupid and noboy loves him

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Whats big, purple and hairy. Has 4 eyes and 2 brains? Nothing.

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Two gay guys walk into a Hooters... They order cheese fries and enjoy their meal.

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Yes and no, I am into literature, I am a writer, of how to rape and kill guides for the whole family (raping the whole family that is, again instructions for the whole family with inspirational quotes) Now give an example of each book to each family member without a cover stating what the book is... ...And after the first time, the world was never the same again.

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Roses are Red Violets are blue Goldfish

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Why did the man have 3 girlfriends? A: because he is a womanizer

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Theres a black a guy and a mexican in a car, whos driving? The black guy, they are best friends and happen to both be neurosurgeons.

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who drinks pee? katness

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Yidi Huang lives here.

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What did the pope do when he saw the grinch? He prayed for his soul.

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What was the dying boy's last wish? Not to die.

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whats red that looks like ketchup taste like ketchup and is't tomato sorce? ketchup

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Why did the chicken cross the road? A chicken doesn't need a motive to cross a road, it just does.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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