What did the young boy say to the adorable kitten? "Aww"

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Yo mama so fat, she was accepted to a clinical trial for treatment of morbid obesity in middle-aged women.

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shall i compare thee to a summers day, no, because thee are ugly, yay

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Daughter: Mom can i watch a movie? Mom: Sure. Daughter: Thanks mom! You're the best mom in the world! Well....Mary is, since she had Jesus.....But anyway. Thanks!

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A seal walks into a club.

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Q. How much wood would a Wood-Chuck chuck if a Wood-Chuck could chuck wood? A. Wood-Chuck's clearly cant chuck would so what is the point of trying to figure out a question that would never take place in real life?

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if a dinosaurs could talk, what would they say nothing their all dead

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Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and he wanted to die with his body completely attached.

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How many Puerto Ricans does it take to clog the treads of my tank? Eight

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I used to be an adventurer like you... then I enlisted for much safer guard service with a more steady salary.

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A man walks into a school, he then proceeds to gun down the majority of the students before taking his own life. What a sad, sad day.

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What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot.

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"Knock Knock" "Who the hell is it?" "Patri..." "Go the hell away!"

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Why did Jim fall out of the tree? Because Jim is a leaf.

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whats red that looks like ketchup taste like ketchup and is't tomato sorce? ketchup

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What is the favorite song of Lady Di? no, that is a dead person and must be respected.

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What did the deaf, dumb, blind, parapalegic kid get for Christmas? Cancer

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why did the chicken not cross the road? He ran

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What did jell say to the carriage driver from Uzbekistan that was underpaid and had no banter? Oh My God ROFLMAOOTG (the last three are "on the ground") "I will beat you with a small child that I will soon feed to the T-Rex's" should be on the list.

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a leech? One is a blood-sucking parasite, and the other practices law for a living.

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how many people can you eat? well, im not canniballistic, so none unless i was starving.

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what is worse then breaking on arm breaking two arms what is worse then breaking two arms the holocaust what is then the holocaust Obama care.

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Why did the black guy cross the road? i have no idea but i hope he got to the other side safely.

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What did one narwhal say to another Hi ;)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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