Roses are brown Violets are brown Who the hell keeps shiting in my garden

A man walks into his local store, he gets a basket and get a tin of beans, an apple, some kitchen rolls a bag of potatoes and an 8 pack of sausages. He walks to the checkout and the lady working asks him ''Are you single?'' He replies ''Yes, i am actually, how did you know?'' The lady then says ''Because your Ugly as Sin''

What do you get when you cross The Incredible Hulk and King Kong? Two angry fictional characters.

Your mom is so stupid she went back to collage and got her masters n buissnes.

What did the rabbit say to the frog? If you think the rabbit said anything, you need to see a psychiatrist.

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If I said "This AntiJoke will get thumbs up" It will get thumbs up

A kid walked in to a bar, grabbed a napkin, and left

What's black and blue and red all over Sex

What is the difference between a pizza and the Jews? The pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.

What do you call a man with multiple sexual partners? Well, first you strongly urge him to get tested for any contagious and potentially dangerous STD's that could have been transmitted from one partner's genitalia to another person's genitalia which could have very well been he himself. They could be life threatening. Oh, and call him by his first name.

Why did Jim fall out of the tree? Because Jim is a leaf.

Why did the red head never have a boyfriend? She was a lesbian and had always preferred women over men

What do you eat for breakfast and is sometimes blue? Pancakes.

why did the lion get lost? because the jungle is massive.

A man walks into a bar. What's missing? The joke.

How do you call blond girl with no arms and no legs ? A victim of a tragic car accident.

whats gay and can do flips? A gymnast

What did the girl say to her tits? I wanna suck u.

Why did it suck to be a black jew during the Holocaust? cause you had to go to the back of the oven

How do you confuse a blonde? Say eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

What is Michael Bay's favorite fruit? Melon

Whats worse than a blonde jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car, and orphaning two little girls who are beat in the orphanage and become homeless and unimportant and consequently jumping off bridges themselves?

Why is the black guy unable to support his family? He's 3 years old.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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