A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

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What's the difference between a Duck and Michael Jackson? A Duck has feathers and goes "Quack quack" and Michael Jackson touches little boys......

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conrad profit

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Why did the elephant fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second elephant fall out of the tree? Because ie was glued to the other one. why did the third elephant fall out ot the tree? Because he thought it was a game. why did the tree fall? Because there were elephants in it.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? ..... he didn't

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because, the farmer lacked basic fence mending skills

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How do you get a clown to stop smiling? Hit him with an ax

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Why'd the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Whats red and eats like dog? A fox.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new home? No. Neither has he....

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Whats funnier than a Dead Baby in a bathtub? Nothing Thats as good as it gets!

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There are two muffins in an oven. One says nothing. Muffins can't talk.

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What do you call it when Chuck Norris gambles? Chuck Norris does not gamble. That would imply the chance of losing.

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Knock knock Who's there Interrupting camel (Interrupt with nothing) Camels can't talk.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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Your mom is such a slut she had sex with your dad on the very first night of their marriage!

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2 women were sitting quietly

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The white supremisist woman with anxiety dialed the suicied help hot line. The operator that answered was clearly African-American. She then hung up the phone and continued to call back and try again.

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What's worse than loosing your pen? Getting raped by a pedophile.

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Justin Bieber walks into a bar. <>

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roses are black violets are too im colorblind how about you

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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"You know what sucks?" "vaccuums?" "you know what meteforically sucks?" "Black holes?" "you what just isn't cool?" "Lava?"

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Racism is like black people... It should not exists...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops