What do you get when you put white cheese in a blender and turn it on? White cheese.

What's awkward? Your phone going off at a funeral What's more awkward than that? Your ringtone is Highway to Hell

Chuck Norris doesn't swim... He never learned

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know. Chickens like to wander around.

What do Elephants never forget? 9/11

What did the bungee jumper say to his wife? Honey, I'm going bungee jumping today.

Are you Drew?

Win and Beau have no friends

What is worse than the Haulocost? Running across Africa with KFC

Why did the chicken cross the road? Just kidding, it got hit by a car on the way to the other side.

what does the black guy order for a drink at the bar. kool aid

So a bunch of blondes are in a group and a murder comes by and sais, "if you want to live, answer a question right." so the blondes pick there smartest on. the first question is, what is 9+4... the blonde answers five, the crowd goes "give her another chance giver her another chance, same thing happens, she gets it wrong and the crowd goes "give her another chance, give her another chance." the murderer sais "ok fine this is your final guess, what is 2+2" the blonde goes "uuhhhhhh... 4?" And the whole crowd goes "give her another chance give her another chance

Every time a bell rings, a noise is made.

What is your favorite joke? I like bar jokes. Okay knock knock Who's there? A bartender A bartender who? A bartender walks into a bar but before he went through the door, he decided to knock on the door because this lame joke is so random.

Whats very large and produces alot of seamen. The US navy

Why did the black man buy a watermelon? To eat it of course

What is red, blue, and green all over? A piece of paper with three colors on it.

Your mother is so fat that she is highly likely to get heart disease and/or diabetes.

How do you keep an idiot busy? Why would you wanna keep an idiot busy, it's not gonna make a difference...

What's the difference between red paint and blue paint? One looks like blood and is used a lot in restaurants. The other is blue.

Why did the banana go to the hospital? It didnt, bananas cannot speak or walk. It is a simple fact so you should know.

Why is god mean? Cause he doesn't like you.

Why did the 16 yearold pregnant girl cross the road? To get to the abortion center

Why are the British so uptight? I don't think they are.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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