- Anti Joke

What did the lemon say to the turtle? If you think the lemon said anything, something is wrong with you.

Micheal Jackson walks into a bar?

A man walks into a hospital with a panicked expression, and rushes to his doctor's office. "Doctor, I am in tremendous pain when I breath!" "Hmm, seems to be a lung problem, take one of these antibiotics twice a day." "Thank you so much!" "Oh yah! Your family was brutally killed in a sixteen car pile up."

What does a plum and a rabbit have in common? A: they're both purple, except for the rabbit!

Two muffins are in an oven. The first muffin says, "Boy it's hot in here." The second says, "It sure is." Both muffins then faint from heat exhaustion and are eaten to death when taken out of the oven And thus tragically, the world would never know of the spectacular talking muffins.

How do you kill a Mexican? Rupture its vital organs like any other organism ,but murder is wrong and should not be done under any circumstance

Why did Miley Cyrus have to buy a new tour bus? The old one stopped twerking.

why do you care?

What does WTF stand for? Welcome to Facebook!

What's the difference between women and a bucket? before 1923, women didn't have the right to vote. Bucket's still don't.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Why wasn't the black woman allowed on the bus? It was rush hour and the bus was full.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? because she was SHITFACED!!!!

9001

if life gives you lemons, you have some lemons

How did the carpenter do on his exam? Poorly so his parents killed him.

Womens' Rights

Man: I'm just popping out to get cigarettes (He never returns.)

How do you get a black person to drop chicken? Yell KKK.

knock knock whose there? my penis.

Q: What did the Mexican kid get for Christmas? A: My bike.

Why do people read Bibles? To learn about God.

Why did the man fall off the cliff? I pushed him????????

How do you shoot a basketball? With your hands

Your mom is so fat, She should go to a doctor because her cholesterol is abnormally high.