this sentence will not monkey banana pie

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I took your mother out to a fine seafood dinner. I never called her again.

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FUCK YOU NEVEN

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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why did the plane crash? the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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There once was a man from Peru, Who fell into an extremely deep sleep and woke up just before he choked to death on his shoe rubber.

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Your mama is so fat, her gravitational field varies with distance cubed!

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=LJP1DphOWPs#!

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 has two penises

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why do elephants drink so much? to try to forget.

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OMG guess what she just told me!! idk......im deaf.

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An apple a day keeps the doctor away. What about the vampires?

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Why did the guy throw a clock out his window? Because he was mentally unstable and needs help.

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myspace

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What did the white man say to the muslim? Hi

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What's the difference between dogs and humans? 8.

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A man walks into a bar. He buys a drink, drinks his drink, and leaves.

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How do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it's face.

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Why do reindeer pull Santa's Sleigh? Because Santa won't feed them if they don't.

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Q:Why do people not live forever? A: Because they die dumbass.

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Why is a blonde a door knob... Because everybody gets a turn

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You know whats retarted? people with down syndrome.

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What was the little boy doing in the deep end of the swimming pool? Drowning.

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How do you punish an electrician? Kill his family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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