my nAME IS ALAN AND IM NOT COOL

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Q: What's big, brown, and smell like crap? A: Turd.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead.

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I Used to be an Adventurer like you, Then I retired to achieve the top Anti-Joke.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because he was dead

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How did the suicide bomber die? Cancer.

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What eats McDonalds for breakfast, lunch and dinner, annoys everyone around them, and could care less about anyone but themselves? The population of the United States.

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You have been brought down to hell where you are welcomed by satan. "Welcome to hell, where you watch your loved ones get tortured for all eternity" Satan said "Where is everyone? " you ask "Hmmm, I guess you were never really loved"He replied

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I've got a dig bick

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Jim and Dave walk into a bar. The bartender says, "what'll it be?" Dave is black.

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why was the boy laying on the ground? he got shot in the head

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two blondes walk into a bar... to get to the other side

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken crossed the road accidentaly as chickens are absent minded.

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Q: What happened when Bob the Super-mega-ultra man, in his hurry to return an item that was objectively proven to be hazardous to physically normal people, banged his head very hard against a wall of a random building that was located on his route of travel? A: He recieved a concussion and had to coalesce in bed for a long time in order to return back to his regular style of living. Bob was merely a nominal 'Super-mega-ultra' man. He gets hurt practically as easily as anyone else.

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What does a Dominican and a Russian have in common... they are both thinking of a funny anti-joke to post on this site...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know. Chickens are incapable of communicating with humans and thus the intent of the chicken can only be speculated.

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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? Good friends enjoying a summer activity.

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what do you do if you get in a car wreck with a black man get out of your vehicle and exchange insurance information

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Q:If an apple and an orange had a politicial debate, what would it concern? A:Nothing important.

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YOLO.

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Salad. It's green and so is The Hulk.

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how do you put a giraffe in a fridge? open the door, put the giraffe in and close the door. how do you put an elephant in a fridge? open the door, take out the giraffe, put the elephant in and close the door. the lion king is holding a conference in the jungle and all the animals turn up except for one, which animal is missing? the elephant, it's in the fridge. you come across a river you need to cross, but it is infested with man-eating crocodiles, how to you cross the river without dying? just swim across, all the crocodiles are at the conference.

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why did the little boy drop his icecream? he was hit by a train

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Why didn't the girl put on her mascara? Because she was too poor to buy any.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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