What just hit my face? The floor

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It's Adam and Eve, not Steve and Eve!

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A girl asked a guy if he thought she was pretty, He said 'No'. She asked him if he would want to be with her forever. He said 'no'. She then asked him if she were to leave would he cry, Once again, he replied 'no'. She had heard enough. As she walked away, tears streaming down her face the boy grabbed her arm and said.. 'Asking emotionally charged hypothetical questions that are completely irrelevant to the prior conversation is known as fishing for compliments. Except, your tears seem to reflect a more serious inner emotional neediness. I suggest you seek a psychologist.'

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Anti jokes gives me cold sores

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How do you get a camel out of a desert? a helicopter

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Two men walk in to a bar, one buys a beer. The second receives a phone call and leaves.

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Women's Rights.

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What do Chinese people call Chinese food? Food.

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Why did the mass murderer abandon his killing spree? He found out it was illegal.

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I once went seven years without sex, then I turned eight and my uncle raped me.

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Why was the man cold? Because he was dead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Someone threw birdseed.

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You are so average that, if you entered an average contest, you'd come in middle place.

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Diseases show if a prerson lacks vitamins and minerals.

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Why did the boy rip out all of his hair? He was insane.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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A man walks into a doctors and says 'Doctor, Doctor, I have a bad stomach ache' Upon hearing this, the doctor writes the man a prescription for medication and wishes him a swift recovery.

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-What do you call the brown spots in your yard? Dog shit.

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A blind guy was reading the newspaper, it said flying cars. I bet he did'nt see that coming!

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What did the milk say to the oatmeal? I came from a cow nipple.

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SIMPLE EQUATION: John has 32 chocolate bars. He eats 28. What does he have now? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

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roses are red violets are blue i shouldnt be on this cause im in class

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So I was eating pancakes in my driveway...or were they waffles?

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A man walks into a bar and says "hey bartender wanna help me out!" The bartender says "no."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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