How many Weasleys does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 2

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Why couldn't the drunken man walk in a straight line? Because someone shot him in the face.

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A germaphobe is in a room full of sick people. He leaves.

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this is an anti joke THIS IS NOT A JOKE O:

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what's black and blue and has red all over it? A dead body ^_^

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Why did the man bring the computer to the doctor because it had a virus

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how do you kill a blonde? the way you would kill anyone, here are some examples gun knife noose or orange. wait wtf who kills someone with an orange

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the sloth fall out of the tree? Because it was holding hands with the monkey. Why were the monkey and the sloth holding hands? Because they were best friends.

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What is big, white, and hurts when it falls from the sky? A FRIDGE

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person 1: Did you hear about the black man that went to college? Person 2: no i haven't Person 1: either have I What's ironic is that they are both black

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Why did I have sex with your mom? Because she was a beautiful individual with a fine taste in the classical arts. She also offered me a ride to her place for a delicious 3 course meal. Afterwards our romance blossomed and we decided to have sexual intercourse to show our mutual appreciation for each other.

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There are four worms walking in a straight line. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The fourth worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? No one is quite sure because technology is not advanced enough for humans to converse with chickens.

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What is less sanitary than eating food off of the ground? Anal sex.

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Nothing yet CC

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Why was the man cold? Because he was dead.

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A: Knock Knock! B: No ones home.

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A dog goes to his food bowl. He eats his dinner.

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Why did the black lady yell? She was being raped.

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What did the goat say to the other goat? They are poorly evolved animals and incable of speaking.

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You know what's never heard of? Father's Day in Camden.

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womens rights

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Q: What is the meaning of life? A: We don't know. Dwight: FALSE. The answer to everything is 42.

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A homeless guy walked up to me and said "Any change?", to which I replied, "Nope, your still homeless". We laughed and laughed. The he stabbed me.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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