Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? People cross roads all the time, each for their own personal reasons. Questioning their motives is generally accepted as being unnecessary, as it is a relatively safe action as log as one is careful and heeds the laws of traffic.

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It burns when I pee sometimes.

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what reason a man dont cry when the dog of his own childs dies? *guess the answer now a) he killed it b) he didnt like it c) a + b

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A man walks into a bar. We see him as he approaches the register wearing a dark hoody. The surveillance camera seen here catches a glimpse of the man's face appearing to be a white male with mustache and beard. As you can see the man opens the register and takes the money before the bartender can get to him. If you have any information about this crime please call crime stoppers at 1-800-GET-HELP. In other news, the DOW JONES reached a record high today as investors in China begin working on keeping the economy from plundering.

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What happened when a boy used the wrong punctuation and grammar, plus forgot how to spell the word know? i dont ;now!!!!!!!!!

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When life gives you lemons, throw them at pedestrians.

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Roses are Red Violets are blue I like poo F*** on You By drew bolton

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When life gives you lemons, find someone with a papercut.

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Roses are red pickel are green i split you legs whats in between

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What happened to the man who dropped his soap? Nothing he picked it up and lived a happy life.

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Juggling lions and breast feeding.

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Money is no object. Because I don't have any.

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A Jew walks into a bar. It probably hurt

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what's the hardest part about microwaving a baby? holding the camera and masturbating

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? NOT SALLY

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Stewie: MOM! MOMMY! MOMMY! MOMMA! MOMMY! MOM! MOMMA! MOMMY! MOM! LOIS! LOIS! LOIS! LOIS! LOIS! LOIS! LOIS! LOIS! LOIS! LOIS! LOIS! Lois: WHAT!!! Stewie: Hi, hehehehehehe. Family Guy -Louis

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why did the moose cross the road? to eat the baby.

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Q: Why don't Jewish cannibals like Germans A: Because it gives them gas

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Dylan Hodge fingered himself. Hah.

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What did I do last night?work

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Person 1 : i need to sneeze Person 2 : ok ( person 1 sneezes ) Person 2 : bless u ( few seconds later ) did u sneeze? Person 1 : yep :)

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Shit Happens....or sometimes it doesn't! As the person is taken to the hospital with severe constipation.

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What did the Farmer say to his tractor? Most likely his life story, Farmers arn't always the most popular.

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Here is a joke for you: minecraft -blarg

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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