What did the big chimney say to the smaller chimney? Nothing chimneys don't talk

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two penguins are sitting in a bath tub. one penguin says, "hey, can you hand me the soap?" the other penguin says, "what do i look like, a typewriter?"

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knock knock zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz knock knock zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz knock kock ding dong ding di-ding dong zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz sigh weeeeeeeeeewooooooooooooooooo zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz hey yo wake up zzz-oh-huh-what-whos there i've been yelling for like five minutes oh sorry jim will you let me in already all right

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If a tree falls on a cat in the woods, does it make a sound? Yes and no, the tree falling makes a loud noise, but the cat under it is instantly killed, preventing any sound that would of been made by the now crushed feline.

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How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay in unimportant.

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If someone throws a fridge at the boy then they must be exceptionally strong because fridges weigh more than the average human can lift therefor he has a good future ahead of him but will have to live with the fact that he hurt a small child

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What do you call a black man driving a bus? By his name

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knock knock.. who's there? ted? ted, who? STOP f***ing around, you got cancer!

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roses are cows violets are oranges im mental are you too

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What is grey and smells like sand? A Rock.

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Roses are red Violets are blue You think this will rhyme But it ain't gonna.

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Nothing yet CC

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Whats big, white, and will kill you if it falls out of a pine tree? A refrigerator

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What do a squirrel and a cucumber have in common? They both cant ride bikes

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Why did Harry Potter cast a spell on Chuck Norris' penis? Never mind.

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68 :)

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feces

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Why Was Did Jill Cross The Road? She Needed To Get To Work.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

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Have you heard the deaf guitarist? He's really good.

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How often does a black women poop? Every nine months.

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A horse walks into a bar The bartender says "Why the long face?" Unable to under stand English the horse shits on the floor and leaves

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What's the difference between a box of dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

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LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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