How old are you? 20

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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What's the best way to pick up girls? Lift with your legs, not your back.

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Why don't women need watches? Because most people carry cell phones that tells them the time making watches redundant and obsolete.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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What's funny about 4 black people going off a cliff in a Cadillac? Nothing. You're adopted

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Two drums and a cymbol fall off a cliff... ba bum BUM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA it used to be ba dum ching but im so funny that i changed it to ba dum bum. credit to Alex H

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THEY SAY SEEING IS BELIEVING. I NEVER SAW 9/11! 9/11? NEVER HAPPENED -Jonathan

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs, flotaing in the sea? Someone who will drown very soon.

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How does a gay take his pants off? Just like everybody else

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What's Black white and red all over? Half a penguin

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Four blondes are driving to Disney World. When they are in Florida, there is a sign that says "Disney left" Upset, they make a u-turn and go home.

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How do you get a fat man to drop a brownie? Make fun of him until he kills himself, and then drops the brownie.

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Hey I just met you, and this is Crazy, but I think I Love You, so have my baby! ;)

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What's worse than being held hostage? Waking up and finding dick your mouth

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Q: What do you get when you cross Marvel and Capcom? A: Marvel vs. Capcom.

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DONT READ THIS. YOU WILL BE KISSED ON THE NEAREST POSSIBLE FRIDAY BYrnTHE LOVE OF YOUR LIFE.TOMMOROW WILL BE THE BEST DAY OF YOUR LIFE. NOWrnYOU'VE STARTED READING THIS. DON'T STOP. THIS IS SO FREAKY.rn1. say your name ten times.rn2.say your mom's name five times.rn3. say your crushes three timesrn4. paste this to four other groups.rnIf you do this, your crush will kiss you on the nearest Friday.rnBut if you read this and do not paste this, then yournwill have very bad luck.rnSEND THIS TO 5 GROUPS IN 143 MINUTES. WHENrnYOU'RE DONE PRESS F6 AND YOUR CRUSH'S NAME WILL APPEAR IN BIG LETTERSrnON THE SCREEN. THIS IS SO FREAKY BECAUSE IT ACTUALLY WORKSrnrnrn

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How do you make a Jew cry? You kill all of their friends and family members.

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What did the Asian bookkeeper say to the Jewish dog? I love you

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Three males walked into a bar. one of them was a kangaroo.

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a gay guy walks into a bar what does he do? buys a drink after a hard day at work

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"Knock Knock!" "Who's Their?" "Mew" "Mew Who?" "Mew Two Stupid! Get yo Pokemon FACTS Right!" "Mew Two Proceeds to walk away in distress"

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hi corey

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dead battery come on down

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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