Why were little Suzie's parents crying? Suzie was kidnapped by Al Qeada

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You are so stupid you should go to school and get an education so you are able to get a well paying job in this tough economy

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Did you hear about the Blonde who fell off a cliff You Have? Oh Ok, Have a nice day

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Terrorist walked into the bar, all dead, except for a small child. The police came and asked the boy: "Boy, how I survived the blast?" The boy answered: "I'm not a boy, I am broccoli"

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What do you call a gay woman who likes to smoke cigarettes? A lesbian with a possible nicotine addiction.

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Why did the man jump off a cliff? Because he was committing suicide.

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What did Tim play with his friends? Nothing. He has no friends.

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What did the mute person say to the deaf person? Nothing.

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What do you call a baby in a blender? The newest Doritos dip.

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A white man walked in da hood aaand he never came back

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If the red house is made out of red bricks, the yellow house is made out of yellow bricks, and the blue house is made out of blue bricks, what is the greenhouse made of? Ah, I see what you did there. You are expecting me to follow the sequence based on how each house is made out of bricks the same color as their title. However, I am one step ahead of you and I know that the greenhouse is made out of glass panels. But what if it were made out of green glass panels? Then, I suppose, the sequence could continue naturally yet we still have a problem of units - bricks vs. glass. Quite the dilemma we are facing.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frostbite.

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A man walks into a bar and says "Ouch."

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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What is big and white and will kill you if it falls from a tree? My d**k.

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Want to hear a cat joke? Just kitten.

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Why did Sam have no friends? Because he was dead.

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What kind of blue is not heavy? Light blue.

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What do you call a giggling penguin? Personification.

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How do you burn a lot of calories? Set a fat kid on fire.

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myspace

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What do you say when you take a nasty shit in you friends bathroom? There's some nasty shit in there.

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How did the blind man eat his soup? With a spoon. Despite no vision, the man could feel the shape of what he was touching.

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Why did the wealthy black man shoplift from the convenience store? He is a kleptomaniac.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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