How do you get straight A's? Try really hard throughout the school year and when it comes to the exams study enough to ensure you understand all the material, but so so much as to compromise your sleeping pattern, and in turn, your performance on the day.

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Why are black people so tall ? Genetics. duh.

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There are two muffins in an oven. One says nothing. Muffins can't talk.

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What did one cannibal set to the other cannibal? Nothing, because he was eating him.

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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Why did the boy lose his watch? Who cares? It was a shitty-ass watch.

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? Names.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Bob

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Why does Snoop Dogg need an umbrella? Fo' Drizzle

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What did the T-rex say to the velociraptor? Dinosaurs are extinct.

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What really puts a kick into both my life and the lives of others around me? My leg(s) of which recieves messages from a sophisticated bundle of "wires" in my cranium that enables it to act at all.

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Why did the bus drop a boy holding ice cream? Its driver was not paying full attention on the road and was sentenced 15 years for manslaughter.

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Three surfers paddle out into the surf. They had a pretty good time, except one of them got a shit ton of water up his nose.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because someone was chasing it with an axe.

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whos a tramp and stinks? David Bell

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? Nothing, he also had no parents.

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Why did the chicken cross the road. Because, It can't fly

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*insert joke here*

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A duck sits down at a bar and orders a drink. After he finishes, he gets up to leave, when the bartender says, "Excuse me, sir, but you didn't pay for your drink." The duck turned around and said, "I'm sorry, I forgot." So he paid the bartender for the drink and left him a nice tip, and left the bar in a good mood.

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A young gay man comes out of the closet to his conservative, Christian parents. Everything went better than expected.

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im a straight dude and all the gay dudes at school make fun of me oh wait i wrote that backwards

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What did the doctor say to the patient? You have cancer.

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what is pink and fishy? pink fish.

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how to you kill a black man. with a weapon.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops