what do you get when a bear and a man mix a really pissed off bear and a dead man

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What do you call nacho cheese? Stolen.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was being shipped to KFC.

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I'm a like whore

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Why did I put the baby into the blender feet first? So I could see its facial expression

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a person cries in the corner you go over to them and rape them

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what did the ginger say to the other ginger? I dont now i dont speak GINGER!!!

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So there's this bigass moose, and it goes in the store and it asks the lady bitch "where the potatoes at" and the lady bitch says "down aisle 5" so the moose goes down to isle 5 and there aint no potatoes.

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here is Stevie Wonder's poem: sjkgfhdujduehfheuefeufhhf uefuefg eufbejfbefehfehutuge' wiohl;wreohqweiothurelwueths sjtghekltrhlsdifhlziurhlsiurhtwoli

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What do you do if a Polish soldier throws a hand-grenade at you? Run.

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What happened when the black guy looked up his family tree? He discovered long-forgotten relatives who had lived during difficult times for African-Americans in the United States and faced disenfranchisement, extrajudicial killings, and chattel slavery. His sense of racial consciousness and solidarity was thereby reinforced.

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What is the square root of 69? 8.306623863

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Recent US presidents (and their accompanying economy)

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because the grass is always greener on the other side.

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What do two siblings have in common? They both want the other to get hit by a bus.

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What do you call a black man sitting on his porch in the middle of the night playing a guitar? A Musician.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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What did the dad do immediately do after his child died? Cleaned off the knife.

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Why did Johnny fall off his bike? Because Johnny's a goldfish.

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How did the old man keep the kids off his lawn? By molesting their Moms.

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Where's Waldo? Nowhere. Waldo is a fictional character. He doesn't exist.

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What do you call a highschooler who smokes weed, shops at the mall, and has date-raped one girl so far? Popular.

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patty was in sunday school, the teacher asked her "patty who created the universe?" john sliped into the seat next to her and jabbed her with a pen "LORD ALMIGHTY" the teacher said' good patty now who gave himself for us? john again jabbed her with a pin "JESUS CHRIST" "that very good patty now what did mary say to joseph after they had their 23 child?" john jabbed her " IF YOU STICK THAT DAMN THING IN ME ONE MORE TIME ILL BREAK IT IN HALF!!!" the teacher fainted

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What sound does a baby make in a blender? Idk, i was too busy masturbating to hear.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops