Dyslexic devil worshippers sell their souls to Santa

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What's worse than the holocaust? 3,000,000 jews.

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Black people are ugly. They should not live in this world. They are apes. They should live as apes not humans. Why do they have ugly curly hair, fat lips, and a big flat nose? SO UGLY!! EWW

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i did your mom......a favor. by making you......... a sandwhich. i rubbed her pussy.........cat. she saw my dick.........tionary. I slapped her ass...........what i did.

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What did the Mexican man say to the American man? Nothing. Neither of them spoke the same language.

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Why didn't the girl put on her mascara? Because she was too poor to buy any.

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What is funnier than an uncontrolled explosions? Most things, because explosions damage property, and cause deaths.

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What's harder than a rock? The dead baby in my freezer.

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This guy goes to the ball game. He waits in line at the concession stand and gets a footlong hot dog and a giant orange soda. Then he makes his way around to his section of the stadium, and works his way to his seat, which is in the center of the row. Right when he's about to take a bite of his hot dog, when he hears someone in the seats way up behind him yell "Hey! Mike!" He sets down his hot dog, and sets down his giant orange drink, stands up and turns around, scanning the crowd. Eventually he sits back down. He picks up his hot dog, picks up his giant orange drink, and is just about to take a bike when he hears it again, someone way up behind him yelling "Hey! Mike!". So, he sets down his hot dog, sets down his giant orange drink, stands up, turns around, and scans the hundreds of faces in the seats behind him. After a while, he sits back down. Then, right when he's about to bite into his hot dog, he hears someone behind him yelling "Mike! Hey, Mike!" He sets down his hot dog, sets down his giant orange drink, stands up, turns around, cups his hands around his mouth and yells as loud as he can, "My name's not Mike!"

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Why did little Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. A. Knock, Knock! B. Who's There? Not Suzie.

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a man and a woman walk into a alley. They get mugged the man fights back out of pride and then gets stabbed the woman escapes and then goes to the police the man is then found two days later. *gasp* what a weird dream.

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What do you call a depressed nerd who plays WoW. Me....

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How come Emmet Till never attended college? Because he was brutally murdered.

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How do you scare Chris Ferguson? No one knows, he always has a pokerface on.

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How many black men does it take to change a light bulb? Just one, you racist.

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Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road To Get To The Other Side

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What's worse? Cleaning a New York bathroom, or getting stabbed. WELL I DON'T GIVE A GOD DAMN!!! They both suck!

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Why does it take more than one blond to replace a light bulb? Because one had no arms, thus requiring the help of another person. It just so happened that that other person was a blond.

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What did the bartender say to selena gomez? Your hot.

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What did my dad say when i knocked over the christmas tree? nothing, my father is dead

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You can pick your friends, you can pick your nose... But that's disgusting.

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What do you call a dolphin on a unicycle? You need medical help

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Why wasn't the turkey hungry on thanksgiving? Because it was dead!

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What do you have if you have a green ball in your right hand and a green ball in your left hand? Two green balls.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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