- Anti Joke

What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

Three Jews are hiding under the floorboards. One of them makes and noise and they are promptly found by the invading German soldiers. They are all shipped to Aushwitz where two of them are sent directly to the gas chambers where they are killed. The third Jew survives the Holocaust and is eventually liberated by Allied forces. He returns to his country only to find his house burnt to the ground. With no money or food, he starves to death by the side of the road and his body is eaten by various animals.

Q: How did Whitney Houston die? A: Who?

How do you shoot a basketball? With your hands

Want to hear a good joke? The NBA.

Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar. Homo-sexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual panda just have piece?

who likes fried chicken? almost everyone because fried chicken is delicious

What do u call a black man playing a jumping sport? I don't know but it is totally normal.

Why did the kid fall off the swing? He had no arms.

Q:What happened when the black guy walked into the bar? A:He bought a drink and quietly drank it until he was finished.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

two parrots are seated on a perch. One turns to the other and says, "Do you smell fish?"

What's black and white and red all over? A bloody zebra.

I walked a few Km from home.. Something stops me in my tracks, there lies A LIE!

what did one tree say to the other? move over

motley crew

A:Knock Knock, B:Who's There? A:Orange, B:Orange Who? A:Orange Banana.

A man walks into a pet store. He then says "This isn't the bar" and leaves.

why did the f a g perform fellatio? because he was a sick c unt

What'd the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Just Dance 2 the video game

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a truck!

if life gives you lemons you probably have problems

What's up brah brah

9001

Why couldn't Suzie put on her boots? Because she got her legs amputated.