What do you call a highschooler who smokes weed, shops at the mall, and has date-raped one girl so far? Popular.

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BALLS! said the Queen if i had them i would be King

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Where's Waldo? Nowhere. Waldo is a fictional character. He doesn't exist.

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a hard working man goes home after a long day at work to find that his wife left him for his even harder working father.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because he was hungry and mcdonalds was across the street

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Roses are red Bacon is red Poems are hard Bacon

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A blonde, a redhead and a brunette was stranded on a deserted island. A genie appeared and said nothing, because genies doesn't exist

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How do you make a Plumber cry? Kill his family.

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knock knock, whos there? the repo man.

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What do you call a black man sitting on his porch in the middle of the night playing a guitar? A Musician.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because the grass is always greener on the other side.

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A Knock, Knock B There's no door. What are you knocking on?

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fish, just because it has a disability it doesn't mean you can treat it any differently

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Why did the white girl have a black friend? Because she was very welcome to different races and wanted to learn about her culture.

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What did the dad do immediately do after his child died? Cleaned off the knife.

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Mr Webb *Hit keyboard loudly* -...

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patty was in sunday school, the teacher asked her "patty who created the universe?" john sliped into the seat next to her and jabbed her with a pen "LORD ALMIGHTY" the teacher said' good patty now who gave himself for us? john again jabbed her with a pin "JESUS CHRIST" "that very good patty now what did mary say to joseph after they had their 23 child?" john jabbed her " IF YOU STICK THAT DAMN THING IN ME ONE MORE TIME ILL BREAK IT IN HALF!!!" the teacher fainted

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Why'd Katie fall off the swing? She had no arms

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the doctor says to the patient " i have some good news and some bad news" the patient says well what is it dock " well the good news is your fine " the patient asked what the bad news was and the doctor said " i lied about you being fine you have aids, and testicular cancer and you have 2 days to live"

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A man buy's a new lawn mower, it breaks so he takes it back. The shopworker says that if you don't have a recipt then you cannot replace it, the man goes home and months later catch's a flu.

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Roses are red, violets are blue my name is clearance, and i have to poo

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What do you call a man who laughed at a joke that wasn't funny? A man who gets amused at the littlest things.

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What do you call a qoman with 10 kids? A mother with 10 kids

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An Asian man man couldn't find his family, he is deeply concerned and contacts the missing persons unit.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops