Did you hear what happened when the President, the Pope and the Dalai Lama went golfing? Neither did I.

A bear walks into a bar and says to the barman "I'll have a pint of................ beer please." The barman says "why the big pause?"

What has five letters and sounds like "trucks?" Vroom

A man walks into a school, he then proceeds to gun down the majority of the students before taking his own life. What a sad, sad day.

What did the stop sign say to the no smoking sign? Stop

If life gives you lemons, you shoud be thankful it didn't give you AIDS.

Why did Justin Beiber cross the road? He didn't because he is still in the closet!

whats gay and can do flips? A gymnast

If you are riding a horse, how many watermelons does it take to kill a giraffe? Platypus.

Why was the black man afraid of the chainsaw? Because its a potentially dangerous weapon

Jake: "Guys Apple's new phone is going to be curved." Bob: "Who makes curved phones?" Jake: "Apple."

Why do latins like soccer so much? Because it's a very popular sport in the whole world.

You know what's funnier than 24? 25.

Why did the pasta not taste good? Because your mom made it.

What has two thumbs and cancer? This guy.

A blonde, brunette and redhead are stuck on an island that is a mile away from any civilisation.The blonde decides to swim to find help. The blonde swims half a mile, has a rest and then carries on swimming.

"Lack of sleep" is that like... Sleep deprivation?

Whats worse than a blonde jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car, and orphaning two little girls who are beat in the orphanage and become homeless and unimportant and consequently jumping off bridges themselves?

Q: what did the common cold say to the cough? A: you are SO annoying!

Roses are red Violets are red Oh god I'm bleeding It's getting in my eyes

69

What is the difference between a cow and a pig? To get to the other side.

The 80's

What is more scary than an AK47,blood,and 99999 naughty children? Nothing problaly :p

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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