What did the the policeman say to the band member who trashed a hotel room? "You're under arrest" The band member replied "Well, you're under a vest" The policeman reiterates that this isn't the time to be making any jokes and that vandalism is a very serious offence

What did the young boy say to the adorable kitten? "Aww"

I dont no the difference between their and there

Why did people spend $100 on Kanye West's plain white T- shirt? Because it was a good looking T-shirt.

A dyslexic Irishman walks out of a bra.

Why couldn't the dog say anything to the cat? It was born deaf.

What did the black guy said when he ate a pie? Nothing, he learned not to speak with a full mouth.

what's worse than getting a bad test grade? being raped.

Milk MILK MILK MILK M-I-L-K M-I-L-K M-I-L-K M_I_L_K M_I_L_K M_I_L_K What do cows drink? Water, and if you thought it was milk, your probably retarded.

Why did Henry jump of a cliff? He was in deep depression.

what do you call a black man on the moon? Kid Cudi

patient: Doctor, It hurts when I go like this. doctor: Don't do that.

Once upon a time, there was a gorilla who found Suzie. Suzie was mauled because she had no arms

How many Jews can you fit in a Volkswagon? 5 comfortably

There once was a man from Nantucket. He still lives there.

How do you kill a blonde? Stab her.

what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas?

What does a black man, an Irishman, and a Jewish man all have in common? Male genitalia.

What do you call a man with multiple sexual partners? Well, first you strongly urge him to get tested for any contagious and potentially dangerous STD's that could have been transmitted from one partner's genitalia to another person's genitalia which could have very well been he himself. They could be life threatening. Oh, and call him by his first name.

matt shut up

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Probably cheese, since there really isn't a possesive form of the noun.

If quizzes are quizzical, then what are tests? Well, a test is a well thought-out series of questions, usually used in schools to determine a students final grade.

Q. How much wood would a Wood-Chuck chuck if a Wood-Chuck could chuck wood? A. Wood-Chuck's clearly cant chuck would so what is the point of trying to figure out a question that would never take place in real life?

what do you call a pig that knows karate? pork-chop!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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