What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer? This would be unlikely to happen, as it would cut the story short.

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whats the difference between jimmy saville and a horse? jimmy has a bigger cock

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Men, get on the boat.

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How many blacks does it take to screw in a light bulb? blacks don't work

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26 because if 25 is funnier than 24, 26 should be even funnier right?

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Did you hear about the homeless man? He asked me if I had any spare change. I didn't. I found the encounter to be very depressing.

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what is worse the Holocaust or slavery? patantan!

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What's black and white and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

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If u wanna get high, smoke weed

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Me and me!!!! LOL! i'm a comedian!

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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I went to the game and saw a Mexican wave. So I waved back at him.

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how do you drown a blonde? strategically place a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of a swimming pool (or just a regular sticker because, quite honestly, they won't be able to tell the difference as the water fills their lungs)

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Why does Santa Claus not have children? Because he only comes once a year.

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What's are the screams and terror when midnight hits? Vannlia Ice's face.

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3 penguins meet each other in penguin #1's backyard for a pool party. The first penguin climbs up the steps of the water slide gets to the top, looks around and then slides down the slide *SPLASH* The second penguin climbs up the steps, looks around then slides down the slide *SPLASH* The third penguin hastily climbs the steps and slides down the slide radio -Soulbroker

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A woman walked into the doctors office with a black eye. The doctor asked: How did you get that? The woman said: I fell.

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My life :(

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Q: Why do so many people write "So a man walked into a bar" A: Because they lack the intellect to think of something creative, and still other peoples material.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman...

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What eats McDonalds for breakfast, lunch and dinner, annoys everyone around them, and could care less about anyone but themselves? The population of the United States.

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If your canoe is stuck in a tree, in the middle of august, with no headlights, how many pancakes does it take to get to the moon? A: None, snakes dont have armpits :D

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They say the human body is comprised of 70% water, it's more like... 60% because I'm dehydrated if know what I'm saying... I should really drink some water.

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How did the blond become a lawyer? She didnt. After many years of collage and studying, she broke down and quit, and became a stripper.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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