John: Hey Bill, ORANGE you in the mood to go to a Phillies game? Bill: Yes! So let's make like a banana and raise our potassium levels drastically and leave right away to beat the rush hour traffic.

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A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

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Ay Bee Cee Dee Ey Ef Gee Haych Eye Jay Kay El Em En Ow Pee Queue Our Es Tee You Vee Doubleyou Ex Why Zed Now you know your ABC, come along and sing with me!

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"why did the chicken cross the road?" "to get to your house" "knock knock" "who's there?" "The chicken"

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Three men sat at a pub, it reminded them of this joke they once heard

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so i turned on my radio.. so i could like listen to some tunes but like, it wasnt working and then like my best bud leaf was all like dude, thats a toaster.

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What do you say the big head boy? Brush yo teeth

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Why was little Timmy an orphan? His family were slaughtered when he was three.

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What do you get when a fat kid eats a donut? A Heart Attack.

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Why is Osama bimladin dead? Because he was a threat to American for many years, and someone finally found him and killed him.

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The man who invented the teleprompter has died at the age of 91. When President Obama heard the news, he was speechless.

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Q: Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A: One stops sucking when you slap it.

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What did Death say to Life? "Look, I respect that you waited till after I broke up with Sandy to ask her out, but it's still a little akward for me, so although there are no hard feelings, it's probably better if we keep our distance from each other for awhile."

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What did Santa get for a young boy? A gun.

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What is worse than 20 black men stealing your TV? Having your family die in tragic car accident.

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So, why is winter so terrible? Because, Napoleon was stopped by winter and we aren't all French.

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Why did Michael Jackson became a white person? Because the society hates black people

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How do you stop a baby from falling into a manhole? You catch it, and then call the appropriate services and inform them of the dangerous open manhole.

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why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the retard's house *knock knock* who's there? the chicken

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Ham sandwich

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Q: What did zero say to the eight? A: Nice belt

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what is pink and fishy? pink fish.

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What's worse than a bad anti-joke? A bad anti-joke about Skyrim What's worse than a bad anti-joke about Skyrim? The Holocaust

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thumbs up!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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