Two guys walk into a bar; A Mexican and a Canadian. The Mexican guy says "Bartender, give me a 2 shots of Tequila, por favor". The Canadian guy says "Bartender, give me a shot of Club and a Molson, eh". They continue to drink until neither can feel the crippling pain of their mundane lives - then they each leave the bar, walk home and sleep alone.

A man walk into a bar. He then falls down, quickly picks himself up, and continues his life.

test

The Cubs are going to win the world series this year

A man walks into a bar. ouch.

Why can't Sally ride a bike? Because Sally's a fish.

Whats better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded

WHat did REAAAALLLY Jesus say when, walking on, wat, er?, Will somebody please get me of this floating piece of ice? Please? Stop screaming HALLELUJAH! People: HALLELUJAH!

What did the bi-polar girl do when she found our her ex-boyfriend was living with another woman? Nothing; she was happy for their new relationship and realized life moves on, in addition to taking the appropriate amount of medicine as directed by her doctor for her condition.

how much wood can a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood three wood

What would you call the fatty cranial mass surrounding a malignant tumor? Ted Kennedy's Head.

The doctor asks the patient how he's doing, the patient says fine. The doctor says "that's weird cause you have leukemia."

JEWS

How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two.

Luckily Captain America was able to rescue Hitler just before he was trapped in the ice for many years... Thanks to his brave efforts the war continued many more years! Captain America under ice: Why do I get the feeling I did something wrong? Hmm... 30 years later Cap: DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMNNNNNN!!!!!! Moral: On ice, tickets sold out... no clothing required, ladies only, None under 16!

What do you call someone who can't lose? Charlie Sheen

"My foot is killing me" "no, actually it's that noose around your neck"

what do you get when you combine a cat and a dog? nothing since it is impossible to combine a cat and a dog

What is hotter than two girls making out? The Sun.

A man walked into a bar and it hurt.

What's wrong with the beetles? They suck dick

Why did Sally fall off of the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock. Whose there? Not Sally.

What does a snake and a dog have in common? They are both reptiles but except the dog.

Your mom is so fat that she is at risk for type two diabetes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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