A fat man and his dog walk into a bar...the man buys a beer and walks out

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If yesterday was friday, today is saturday, what day is it tomorrow? sunday

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THIS IS NOT SPARTA! *pulls him out of the hole*

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Why did the rabbit cross the road? I don't know, I was asking you.

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Roses are red. Violets are purple. Haha. Purple.

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i joined the nazis... but 2 days later i found out i am a jew

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What's better than winning gold at the special Olympics? Not being retarded. - Blake Woodman

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Ask me if i'm a tree... "Are you a tree?".... No

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What did one chimney say to the other chimney. Nothing, chimneys dont talk.

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Why did the dead baby cross the road? It didn't because it had died from an uncaring mother and father that dumped it's corps on the side of the highway.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was Friday night (or Halloween or St. Patty's Day) and the chicken was at a party. He got totally drunk, and then got the bright idea that it would be okay to drive home. On a rural two-lane highway, his vehicle careened into the oncoming traffic lane, and then the ditch, thus crossing the road. Fortunately, he walked away with only a few scratches. However, he was cited for wreckless driving, and got a DUI as well.

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Penal Dysfunction

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Your mother is so old that she is dead.

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your mamas so fat all she gets for christmas and her birthday is girdles!

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if I was a girl I would be touching my self everywhere if I was a girl as a boy I would make a diffrence in poltics but thats not gonna happen.

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- Knock knock - I have a doorbell

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why did the clown go to the hospital? i hit him in the leg with an axe.

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YOU SUCK RYAN V!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! U SUCK BALLS!!!!!!!!!!!!

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A black man didn't walk into a bar

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how long is a peice of string howeverlong you want to make it

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A man made a sandwich.

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what did the guy tell the other guy? you're gay

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The term "shots fired" often reminds me of the time a couple of buddies had a drinking contest and I shoved a lit cigarette down the loser's throat

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two penguins are sitting in a bath tub. one penguin says, "hey, can you hand me the soap?" the other penguin says, "what do i look like, a typewriter?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops