what do you get when you have unprotected sex with a hooker? an orgasm

Roses are Red Violets are plucked So are my nose-hairs Pretty disgusting

i have a black person in my family tree he is still hanging

Have you heard the one about the Norwegian? He killed 98 people.

Penis

I love you You love me We all grab 2X4's Barney's on the floor No more purple dinosaur.

Why was Bill in jail? He stabbed 17 black people because they didn't deserve welfare checks.

how do you get a baby to stop swinging from a fan whack it with a shovel

your mom is so blind she cant read.

Knock knock. Who's there. Alex. Alex who? Your brother Alex. Oh, please come in.

Why did that guy die? because the SS thought he was a jew.

Miley Cyrus is Twerk Queen

When crossing the river, why the old lady die? She was hit by a falling brick that fell from an airplane.

What's red and smells like green paint? The rotting corpse of the old lady I poisoned with green paint.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Segregation

So three men walk into a bar. One orders a Miller Light, the other orders a Guiness, and the third has a glass of ice water. He was the designated driver.

What is yellow and has thick, shiny fur? A banana. I lied about the fur.

My new Muslim friend is the BOMB

Why was the fat person sad? Because he was fat.

How do u bring a dead person to life? U dont.

What's bigger then a bowling ball? What? Your mom!

What do you call two mexican's jumping the border? people with a hard life trying to get to the new world.

What is black, white, and red all over? A skunk in a blender.

What does an eagle and a worm have in common? They both live in the ground. Except the eagle.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...