What has wheels and flies? An Airplane

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A man walks up to a woman in a bar. They hit it off. That night they make wild sex and fall madly in love with each other. They start dating, it's so fantastic. They understand each other on almost every emotional and intellectual level. They have the same humor and they love spending time together. The sex is so great. After a few years, they get married, and they start the rest of their lives together. They have 2 beautiful children and their lives are blossoming. Fast forward 30 years. They are both retired old people, yet still madly in love. They live in their old home, and their lives are very comfortable. Their children have grown up into adults, and are very happy. Fast forward another 10 years, and they now live in an elderly home. They are both in wheelchairs and their health is slowly deteriorating. They die.

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Q: how do you crush a Chinese man's dreams? A: tell him he is worthless and will never prosper.

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Whats worse than getting dirt on your brand new J's Finding your girlfriend cheating on you with your Great Dane and realizing that he dose her better than you.

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Whats the difference between a cat and a dog? Nothing a cat and a dog is an extremely different species.

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"What happened to John after he got drunk 12 years ago"- police "I don't really don't know that question"- John Jr.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? An Xbox 360.

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mark is mark

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I like apples. So does Mr. Johnson from the local fruit stand.

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Knock knock Who's there? A very long space I see what you did there

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What do you call a black man with a group of 5 white guys? Friends. What do you call a white guy with 5 black guys? a diffrent ratio of black and white friends.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To try and beat the oncoming car.

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Cows make a world go round and round They also live in the town town town They make a funny sound sound sound MOO MOO MOO MOO MOO Where do cows go on saturdays? The MOOvies I am Cow Hear me MOO I weigh 10 times more than you! Why are cows black and white? Cause they dont want to be racist

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A blond, a brunnet and a read head all fall off a cliif, wich one did not die They all died you idiots

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The weels on the bus go...flat

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why did the one handed man cross the road? to get to the secondhand shop.

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what is worse the Holocaust or slavery? patantan!

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What did the guy who killed Osama Bin Laden say? Burn!

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Yo mamma's so old she is dead.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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Why did the girl fall down the hill? Her boyfriend pushed her.

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a guy gets knocked out and wakes up in a alley all bloody and a knife next to him!!!

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A black man walks into a bar and a white man says "we don't allow coloured men in here". the black man sighs and walks out, wondering what he ever did wrong, and makes his way to the liqour store, to buy some beer to drown his sorrows over his mothers death. On the way, a racist white man shoots and kills him. Then, at his funeral, someone makes the joke "Wow, how ironic. The black guy was the victim.."

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What did the German say when the whole of India blew up: "Wow, das muss eine gewaltige Explosion haben! Wie haben sie das geschafft?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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