A snake walks into a bar

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Why did the woman fall off the skateboard? She hit a rock.

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What do get when you cross a lion and tiger? A liger. This hybrid mammal, only observed in captivity, is the largest of all known felines and is thought to be sterile.

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Roses are red,Lemons are sour,Open your legs and give me an hour

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Why did the girl get hit by the bus. Because she was Helen Keller

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why do you care?

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Your mother is so stupid, she is unable to uphold a steady job and cannot support you financially.

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A man walks into a bar, but it's really not his fault because his seeing eye dog led him right into it.

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What is the difference between a pizza and a Black guy? A pizza can serve a family of four.

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What's black and blue and red all over? A baby right after I kill it

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Why did Billy drop his lunchbox? Because he was mauled by a Hippo.

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how many dead babys can fit in a bathtub 17

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At a feminist picnic there are no sandwiches.

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How many Germans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 5.

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call 803-389-9808 for a good time ;D

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I Used to be an Adventurer like you, Then I retired to achieve the top Anti-Joke.

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Q: What's big, brown, and smell like crap? A: Turd.

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A woman walks into a bar and orders a pint of ale. "Are you a Lesbian?", joked the barman. "Yes", replied the woman.

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So two friends walk into a bar. One says to the bartender, "Get me a Miller Lite please." The bartender says, "Sure." The other friend says, "Get me a Cosmopolitan please." The bartender stares at him and says, "That is not the drink I was expecting you to order, but I respect your decision."

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Why are white people not good at basketball? Because they aren't black.

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an asian walks into a bar and does his math homework then he gets raped by a horse

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Which came first the chicken or the egg? The egg because if a chicken came first then that means chickens magically appeared. Eggs however may change over time through evolution by a common ancestor because after millions of years of hatching, it slowly mutated by natural selection and became to what is now known as the domestic chicken. (Applause)

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Q: What happened when Bob the Super-mega-ultra man, in his hurry to return an item that was objectively proven to be hazardous to physically normal people, banged his head very hard against a wall of a random building that was located on his route of travel? A: He recieved a concussion and had to coalesce in bed for a long time in order to return back to his regular style of living. Bob was merely a nominal 'Super-mega-ultra' man. He gets hurt practically as easily as anyone else.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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