wanna hear a good joke? neither do I

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How do you flatten a worm? Feed it to a little boy, and then drop a refrigerator on him.

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Narrator: A ghost walks into a church. It is a Jewish church during a Friday night service. Huh. That ghost looks a lost like Hitler. Oh crap, everyone run for your lives! Stranger: GHOSTBUSTERS! Narrator: what, the, heck? Ghostbuster: let's kill some ghosts! Wait a minute. Adolf, is that you? Hitler ghost: John? Ghostbuster: Adolf, Buddy! Narrator:...... Hitler ghost: Hey, John! Wanna grab a drink? Ghostbuster: sure. let's get out of here. Narrator: This joke has officially lost all meaning. I don't even know why I'm submitting it any more! And get this! I AM HALF JEWISH!

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Why did the man have trouble breathing after meeting the President? He had a collapsed lung.

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?ti saw won troffe eht htrow t'nsaw yllaer siht

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why did the woman cross the road? to get groceries for making more sandwiches.

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Womens rights

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What did the dead Catholic say to Atheist? Nothing. Dead guys can't talk!

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Yes, finally caught that mouse!

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Knock Knock. Whose There? Lettuce. Thats impossible.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs floating on the water? Dead.

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What do you call 99 lawyers in a car going off a cliff with no driver and another lawyer running in the other direction? A dick move.

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Why didn't the blonde go to the party? Her depression finally got the best of her and she shot herself

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Steve: Hey ask me if Im a Pelican. Bob: Are you a pelican? Steve: YES.

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Q: What's fat and smelly? Q: What's worse than Nikki Manaj? Q: What's the bane of everyone and everything's existence? A: Kim Kardashian

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How many cows can you fit in a field? It depends on how big your field is.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "what would you like to drink?". The horse, unable to comprehend english, just nods and proceeds to shit on the floor

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What do Texans call cows? Cows. Calling them almost anything else would be utterly illogical.

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What is worse than a fly in your soup? Getting hit by a train.

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why is Justin Berber gay? hes not thats rust a myth

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U know what they say about big shoes? Big socks

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why do elephants drink so much? to try to forget.

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1:Knock Knock 2:Who's there 1: Your cousin tyler He was then brought in with the rest of the family to celebrate Thanks giving.

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who likes it up the anus? jason frisone at saybrook ave 08094 williamstown new jersey thats who

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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