A mama cow was sitting in the barn with her 3 babies. The first baby cow goes "Mom, why did you name me Daisy?" "Because a Daisy landed on your head when you were born" The second calf goes "Mom, why did you name me Rose?" "Because a Rose petal landed on your head when you where born." The third calf says "Aasdfghoiuytfghjkuiy" The mom replies "Shut up brick"

What do you call Eric Torres A furnace magnet

Q: Why are black people so good at basketball? A: Because they are black!

what's faster than an asian on a bicylce on payday? many things

What did Aaron Pfeifer say to Zach Faller ? Yee

Knock knock Who's there? Police Police who? You're under arrest, open up or we'll knock your door down

Your mama's so fat her patronus is a cake!

Do you know what they say? Words

Womens rights

Who makes the sandwiches in a lesbian relationship?

What's worse than missing your favorite TV show? 9/11.

Two Gay Men Walk Into a Bar, Not Just Any Bar...... a Sports Bar and Enjoy a nice cold Beer with their Heterosexual friends while watching the super bowl. They both go in the back room, where it is dark, together........ and they call for the manager to find out where the chef is so they can tie him down..... and smother him....... in questions concerning the size of his....... buffalo wings stop judging people you ass.

Why did the womens basketball team beat the mens? the men were locked in a refrigerator

What did the dead Catholic say to Atheist? Nothing. Dead guys can't talk!

What's the difference between a duck?

What's better than a worm in your apple? No worms in your apple.

What do you call a man with no arms or legs floating on the water? Dead.

I have a sandwich and chips for lunch! But instead of a sandwich I have macaroni, and instead of chips I have no friends.

A duck walks into a bar, and the bartender says "what'll it be?" The bartender is then sent to a medical clinic after letting several wild animals into his bar and proceeding to feed them alcoholic drinks. He is diagnosed with schizophrenia.

Why did Coolio appear in the joke below? He did not, he was not for real at this particular situation... Well It was actually a typo because some douchebag told me Coolio sang that song and I forgot to change the name after finding the truth... Moral: YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!

Knock Knock. Whose There? Lettuce. Thats impossible.

Why was the first name of the boy 'Price'? His parents were Hamsters.

What do you get if you cross a Sheep with a Kangeroo. An abomination unto God.

What do you call an Arab flying a plane? A pilot.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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