Knock Knock.

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What the kid with no arms get for christmas? A baseball and a glove to go through with his dad

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How do you kill yourself You jump of a cliff

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What's black and twelve inches long? A Maglite.

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Which one is hardest?

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Halo < COD

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Why did the chicken cross the road? why? Womens rights

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A fish finds that his fishbowl is on fire. He escapes the bowl only to realize he is equally screwed.

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Why did Coolio appear in the joke below? He did not, he was not for real at this particular situation... Well It was actually a typo because some douchebag told me Coolio sang that song and I forgot to change the name after finding the truth... Moral: YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!

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Why did the first squirrel fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Peer Pressure. Why did Bobby fall off his bike? He was hit by 4 squirrels Why did bobby die? He was hit by a bus

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What did the policeman say to the chav? Dickhead!

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Are you from Tennessee? Because I can tell by your accent.

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Whats the difference between a Ferrari and 1,000 babies? The Ferrari is expensive and the babies are in a nice hospital.

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What did the cancer patient say after the little boy told him a funny joke? I'm dying

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What's Brown and Sticky? A stick.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven has a hook for one of his hands carries a chain saw in the other an gets into six's dreams...thats just scary

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How could problems have been avoided in the old west? Bigger towns

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What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the the wheels.

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a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o q r s t u v w x y z i left out p.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing Because she had no arms. Knock knock... Whose there... Not Susie Why did the plane crash Susie was flying it

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A white man walked in da hood aaand he never came back

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What did the college student say after he failed his test? He didn't say anything, he was a mute.

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There once was a man from Peru, Who fell into an extremely deep sleep and woke up just before he choked to death on his shoe rubber.

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What is funny about a child with down syndrome? Nothing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops