Why did the chicken cross the road? he wanted to.

SIMPLE EQUATION: John has 32 chocolate bars. He eats 28. What does he have now? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

Why did the blond do so horribly on the SAT's? She was pulled outside halfway through her testing session by the school janitor who molested and murdered her in the bathroom.

A drunk is pissing on the plaza and the cop stands next to him and says, very nice. The drunk says, that's what she said. : )

what ya call e dong withb eyes peeneyes

whats worse than 9/11? 9/12

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 murdered 4 and 5 then raped 10

Have you heard the one about the three tailed salamander that fell off a bridge? I haven't either.

Roses are red Violets are blue Your mom is dead And your dad is too

Good to know tattletale, I remember hating you back then when you betrayed me, but I cant wait to meet you again. Anyway Nero, I am a girl, its not about sex with me, I just had to tell you, and hope you will take better care of yourself, I know you used to be worried about your looks, and I just want you to understand ill be there for you no matter what. Thanks for the kind words Nero, I know you mean them, you never hid the fact that you found me attractive, but while I did not understand then why you would ruin every nice moment by saying something cheesy or rude, I think I get it now... I know you need rest, but can I arrive as soon as possible? Ill just wait outside or something, I wont be a bother I promise.

THERES AN APP FOR ANTI JOKES ? now thats not funny !

Think about it: Is mexico REALLY full of: Lowrides in candy ass sparkly colors such as lip red that bounce, (manly color right? Yeah sure baggot) which contains a whole street war gang of members inside and at least twenty tons of COCAINA! ...But does not have a horn that plays "la cucaracha" Seriously, you say yes right? Hey look at this guy he said yes everybody, but ITS WROOOOOOONG CUCARACHA OR GTFO OF MEXICO! Yeah... Because Mexico is shit, id would be racist if Mexicans didn't agree...

Some blind tall guy asked a rich dude about time when the rich dude looked at his klock he remembred many things in his ugly terrible life so he said to the blind guy : its 5PM

Why did the elephant cross the road? It was the chickens day off. haha its funny

Why did the white man cry? Because his mistress, Shanghai, was threatening to tell his wife that they were in a relationship and, out of anger, he bashed Shanghai's head in and she is dead,

How did the cat die of indigestion? Indigestion

Why did Miss Parkinson get hit by a bus? Because it missed Justin Bieber by a few inches.

William Wright. 8 perry street Answer-Gay

Nock Nock It's open.

What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? A= Were both lawyers! What happens every sixty seconds in the us? A= a minute passes!

What's the difference between a duck?

A Guy walks into a bar Ouch

What's the difference between an alcoholic and a drug dealer? An alcoholic is an extremely corrupted, and unhealthy living person. Though so is a drug dealer... They are both very harmful situations in many ways.

Roses are white, tulips are white, wait whos been masturbating in my garden!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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