Why does snoop dogg carry around an umbrella?? ......fo drizzle

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Why didn't the family go through the door? Because it was a window.

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Q: is this the krusty krab? A: No this is patrick!

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What did the cow say to the chicken? Moo.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

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Why did the coconut fall out of the tree? Gravity.

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What do you call a black guy who sells drugs? a pharmacist

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How do you tell if there is an elephant in your refrigerator? Check for footprints in the butter.

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Kenny died. The Bastards.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What do you call a black man working for Bank of America? A successful individual.

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My phone rang. So I answered it.

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A doctor, a farmer, and a blonde walk into a bar. The doctor orders red wine because he knows it's good for the heart. The farmer orders a Piña Colada because he likes fruit. The two men wait eagerly to what the blonde is about to order. The blonde opens her purse and says "Damn it, I can't find my credit card." Suddenly, a handsome young gentleman walks up to her says "Don't worry miss, I'll buy a drink for you. What are you having?" The blonde looks up and says "Don't worry? I just lost my credit card!" In a fit a of anger, the blonde storms out the bar and doesn't order anything.

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Knock, Knock! Who's There? Your neighbor, I found your lost cat! Oh thanks!

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bob saget

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Q: What did the nomad get for christmas? A: Most likely nothing because he lives in the middle of nowhere where no stores exist. If anything, he got a sandstorm.

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How did the blonde girl get pregnant? Her boyfriend used a condom left in his pants and then was washed. Making it defective and causing her her to become pregnant.

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Why was it sad that the kid was playing football? He had no arms and legs and he was the football.

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why did the chicken cross the road? i don;t know, that's why i was asking you

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What did the blind man look at when the girl showed him her cleavage ? ... Nothing... He's blind... >_>

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Every 60 seconds in Africa, a Minute passes.

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What did pikachu say when his trainer was murdered? Pikachu.

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Cows go moo.

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did you hear about the man who crossed the road? he made it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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