Why did the boy miss the school bus? He died in his sleep

A black man walks into a bar with a parot on his shoulder. The bartender says "Hey you can't bring that in here!" The Parot replies "Sorry i'll have him wait outside."

Yo momma is so fat, I gave her a cupcake and she enjoyed it.

A gorilla walks into a bar and orders a banana martini. The bartender thinks this is a little peculiar and then becomes aware he is actually dreaming. He wakes up from his dream and begins to tell his wife about the ridiculous dream he had. His wife just ignores him, the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes his marriage is in shambles.

Knock Knock Who's there? A mormon *slam*

WHATS BALCK AND YELLOW AND UNDER WATER? A BUMBLE BEE IN A SUBMARINE.... YEAH YOU BETTER #$%^ING LAUGH YOU HOMO

What do you get if you cross a banana, a mango, and an apple? A smoothie

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the other birds had taken hostage the chickens family.

why did the bear fall out of the tree? the bear got shot

Why did the gay man's ass hurt? He has rectal cancer.

The WNBA

Chuck Norris once went skydiving. his parachute did not deploy. where he landed is now known as the grand canyon

How did the Jewish husband and wife stay together forever? They didn't. They ended up in divorce like 50% of all other married couples due to irreconcilable differences.

Knock knock. Nobody answers because the homeowner was out of the house at the time.

A black man walks up to a jewish man in a bar. They engage into a nice conversation, seeing how they were friends back in college.

Two guys are walking down the street. One asks the other "Nice weather today, huh?" And the other responds "It sure is," and they both continue on with their days.

Four homosexuals walk into a bar. They notice that there's only one stool left at the bar itself. They sat at a table with four chairs. They had a delightful time.

An American man stopped me the other day and asked for the time, I looked at my watch and said: 5 o'clock.

What is invisible and smells like bananas? Monkey Farts.

So a seal walks into a club..

Your Mom.

If John has 50 candy bars and eats 45, how many does he have? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Thats where the slaughterhouse is.

How do you know it's a Mexican's birthday? They bring cupcakes to school for your entire class to enjoy.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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